yq's blog

2011-10-03T22:45:00.002+08:00

Its been so long since I've posted here!!

Spending the last moments of my eighteenth life, I've decided to revisit the page of my youth, to recall, to think back, before moving forward into another chapter of life unknown...

I was rather young in the past, naive, childish, foolish, inconsiderate...the usual things that kids are, or maybe I'm only speaking for myself. I used not to think much before translating my thoughts into words, and when I realised I've made a mistake it is usually too late for amends. Letting my heart and emotions take control, was what I did..

From all the way through kindergarden, primary school and secondary...I was surrounded by friends, who liked me and disliked me. The common thing was, these friends accepted me for all my flaws, despite my imperfections, we were still together, right till today. Two has flown overseas for a medicine degree, one in Newcastle, another in mmm sorry trish I forgot >< haha...but all in all...an almost 9 years of friendship! Hanging out with each other, tolerating another's faults, sharing good food, watching great shows, heart to heart talks...our fab sleepovers, laughing together, and simply enjoying each other's company..but as we all grow up and go our separate ways, what will become of this bond? Only time will tell I guess...though I always feel it's so cool that we aren't exactly the best of friends, but yet we never feel awkward with silence...can talk about anything under the sun, and chill with each other despite not seeing each other for so long...talking like we've been seeing each other everyday...yes, that's what we do when we're together, the seamless harmony of friendship :))

School has been a great experience, family pampered me, especially my grandmother and my auntie :))

I moved into JC, and with that move I was displaced to live with my parents. Victoria Junior College has been the greatest decision I feel I've made so far, for the memories that I've brought away with me have been more than priceless. I joined choir, into the paradise of my second family, of love, warmth, laughter, acceptance and joy away from home :) choir room...the stinky LTs, our overseas trips, of Genting, Venice, and yes even the unrealised Austria...our SYFs, competitions, performances, esplanade...the time we spent together, the dinners at PP, the movies at Cathay...the BBQs at cavin's...the image of pocks and robin giving end of practice announcements...siglap CC :))...image of rhoda cedric debra david and jinli doing warm-ups...gradually changing to cav eun joce malcolm and me pumping spirit into the choir on bleary sat mornings...choir has made my JC life ever more experiencial and wonderful than it could have been. Thanks Mr Kwei, for such a magical journey...:)

Class of 09s32...fun-loving yet studious..the times we spent mugging as a class during our A level study breaks..having dinners from thaipan..seated around a table sharing liao...drinking herbal tea brewed by the parent support..:))..going to Mr chong's house...taking snaps of people sleeping in class...teachers (ms ding!) asking the boys to keep quiet..:)) finding tables during breaks to makan...celebrating end of exams, festivals, occasions...BBQ at merv's...countdown to the new year...thanks for being great buddies giammie wennie and merv :)) you guys made my two years so special :)

And now here I am..in NUS! Life sciences has been rather interesting so far, and I hope the end of this journey will be worthwhile all my effort now...

As I countdown to my nineteenth year and recollect...here are a few wishes from my heart:

I wish that everyone around me will stay loving, happy, kind-hearted, healthy, peaceful at heart and caring about one another.

I wish that my family and I can get closer.

I hope that the two of us can grow in our relationship, regardless of differences and disagreements, and accept each other for who we are, to help each other bring out the best in ourselves, to be happy together and enjoy each other's company..be it successful or otherwise in future..

I wish that the friends I have made so far in my life will stay together and love each other till the end :))

I wish for giammie and wennie to always stay close :)

I wish for my sister to do well in her studies.

I wish for everything nice, happy and wonderful. :)

Considering all I have done so far...no regrets..:) and may all this come true :)

Sayonara!! ^^

2010-12-19T12:32:00.002+08:00

Hey! It's been so long since I've posted! Haha, been enjoying myself a lot after As! And before it even ended! ^^

I have been watching a lot of movies, and going out and spending quite a lot! Can't wait to receive my pay so I can erase the negative sign in my savings!

Carolyn, Michelle, Nan, Clairie, Jo and I went to the flea at scape yesterday! As usual, Jo bought the most, then mich bought a cuddly sweater, claire a dress, and I bought a dress toooo! Wish I can see claire in her dress for caroling! Haha.

I got some jobs during the hols, tution for 2 nice (?) primary six girls and being a camp facilitator at high achievers! The camp job would be able to give me a lot of experience I believe, haha, not the usual kind of thing I would usually do^^

I'm going to be enjoying caroling during this christmas week! Haha. It does feel different caroling as a senior! I wouldn't carol next year already I think, all the faces will be different and I wouldn't feel so nice caroling as a stranger! haha..dunno la that's still far away :)

I'm going to my maternal grandmother's house later, wish I can see my nephew! Don't you simply love kids too?^^ they are so easy to love and understand(:

Missing my friends who are overseas!

mmm that's all!

2010-09-26T21:20:00.003+08:00

My previous post was actually on the 8th August! haha according to blogger.

It's been so long since I've posted. There are many things that have happened inbetween the time lapse, mmm but my mind's kind of mixed up about the sequence of events! Somehow I remember the actual events, but not their sequence of occurrence and the date!

Been missing choir a little, studying's so tedious and routine and boring!! I was sick to death of facing the four walls of my house everyday and having to survive on takeouts/instant noodles for the past 1 month we had prelims! In order to salvage my sanity, I shall seek refuge at gram's! Where lovingly cooked food is in abundance to satiate this glutton's desire for fooooodd! :)) I can actually see the sea from the 21st floor you know! So calm and peaceful and ocean-ish:) Though living at gram's is like living in the 1990s, I have a radio and television and my trusty handphone to keep me sane. I can't have my nano either, since I can't charge:((

You know something, giammie and nan and I went to SPCA todae! haha. It was only for fun, though during one of her kuku attacks giammie talked about adopting and leaving at nan's when we go to school. All of us played with a dog that we liked best there. We also agreed to adopt together if we ever live together in future. The animals there looked really sad. The dogs were all barking and trying to escape from their cages. And I think SPCA really needs more funds. Just like all charity organisations. :(

Prelims though a month, was over in a flash! It's quite sad actually, that we're all going to go our separate ways in the matter of a few months. With different commitments pulling us apart, it'll get increasingly difficult to meet up. I will miss seeing everyone everyday, in the morning when we're all still rubbing the sleep from our eyes, during break times when we pace the stalls and debate on where to bestow our spending, during lessons and lectures when we sleep, when we discuss, when we ask questions, when we joke with our tutors...I'm seeing you guys almost everyday, the normal happenings of school...但这自然不过的学校生活...I can't explain how much I will miss everything...simple as school life seems, it's something that I will never want to miss out on even if I have a second choice.

Will be going out tmr, enjoying the last few days of freedom! Until wednesday when I'll be forced to return to my books! Muggggmuggggmugggg

I think it's a little sad that people must be so unforgiving and judgmental. If this particular guy irritates you, you can walk away...forgive, be accepting, fume for a while, and the next day why not be friends again? People express different personalities at different times I think. Or different sides under different circumstances. So just remember people for their good points and forgive them for their bad? :) Maybe it's just a good thing I don't have a very good memory! Perhaps it's bad too, cos I usually can't remember who borrowed things like notes and I end up ransacking my cupboard and feeling irritated when I think I lost them. haha.

Oh dear, I'm supposed to call someone at 945. I don't think I'm gonna make it!

*magic! I've just received an sms to call at 1030 instead! :) How nice things work out.

The class and I went to watch "Devil" at Marina Square on Friday after our last paper! It was so THRILLING! haha. Nicole and I screamed a bit. A lot actually. The first time I screamed in a movie. Haha. It was influence okay! Besides, the theatre had us and 6 other people making up the members of the audience anyway...hee.. The movie was really nice! I kept the tickets and it's so long:)

Sigh..not that I've been slacking also. I did 1 bio mcq and 1 chem paper 2 question (:D) during the weekend. And I answered some questions and did maths and elasticity:)

Oh yeah! Did I post about my piano performance before? Anyways, that was what happened! My first piano performance! It felt so nice to perform on stage! Dance was fun and thrilling, choir was enjoyable (and amazing with mr kwei) but piano really felt different cos it was so much more solo! I felt so happy and high to feel the familiar rush of adrenaline as I stepped on stage. It's something that I will always crave for...the feeling's indescribable :)

Alright, that's it! Until the end of A levels! :) All the best to year 1s for your promos and us for As! :)

2010-08-08T21:48:00.003+08:00

National Day's almost here! Amidst all that cramming for prelims and A levels, should we take some time off to watch the national day parade? It's amazing how nonchalant the younger generation (aka we) are about the country's history and the long way that it has come in achieving success since its independence. As we sing the national anthem (do we?) and recite the pledge every morning we are ~~obliged to go to~~ in school, how many of us actually say the words and mean what we say? Well, some of us don't even know the words. I would be one of those, except that I took MSP in O levels. Sigh..I'm such a patriotic little girl:)

Blogging...has its merits and demerits I suppose. It helps to get stuff off my chest, but the privacy that it offers, well, as with the implications of "world wide web", is virtually negligible.

People are starting to get anxious about their studies, people who have been slacking for almost too long! I wish everyone all the best in their studies and revise but don't burn out too fast:) quoting the math department in the revision booklet, we should "build steadily towards prelims and A levels" :D I've done my work! haha. I should start being like edwin and hibernate with my books. And be as disciplined and determined as he. Sigh..edwinedwin.

I kind of envy the juniors when I heard them practice last week. Choir...seems like a long time ago, yet it seems like yesterday. Funny how your mind jumbles things up regardless of the time of occurrence? If you were to ask me when I celebrated merilyn's birthday, I would say last week, even if it was 2 weeks ago. haha:)

Alright byeez

2010-07-18T17:18:00.003+08:00

Just a random thought, when I read my past entries, I always think I was so ignorant and young. Not past entries written this year perhaps, maybe from my previous blog? The entries then remind me of someone really...young? haha. Maybe I'll read this a few years down the road then start laughing at myself again. Haiz, or maybe it's just me, always so kuku.

Just one month or so to prelims. Sounds really scary. Should start mugging hard too:)

All the best!

2010-07-10T19:56:00.002+08:00

heyhey! Haven't blogged in a while. These few days have been a little....rushed? Time seems to fly yet again. The week after binloh's birthday simply flew by with last minute revisions and CT 2 seem to pass by as quickly too. The after exams celebrations were even faster, affirming the fact that time seems to fly when you're really enjoying yourself. :)

I can't believe I'm about to make 'the' choice. For years I've been waking up, going to school, coming home, doing my homework, sleeping, then waking up...the cycle repeats itself. Isn't it for you too? But what is all these for? I believe I'm not the only one clueless about my future career and all those stuff...as my CT pointed out, this will be a milestone, a huge decision that will alter the rest of our lives. At the age of 18 (to be more exact, 17 +), do you know what you want to do in future? I don't...isn't that regrettable? If a light would appear and show us the way! haha..but that only appears in fantasies I guess..

Fairy tales...I used to pester my mother to read one story to me each night before I went to bed. Among my selections were popular classics like Snow White and the Seven dwarves, Rapunzel, Jack and the Bean stalk, Goldilocks and The Gingerbread Man...these titles can still bring a smile to my face when I think of them. Childhood I suppose, has this magical ability to lighten our hearts and make us smile from inside out:) We were taught from young, that if people were good, kindhearted and selfless, even though there were obstacles, challenges and trials, we will ultimately find bliss in the end and live happily ever after, just like how our Cinderella did. In my opinion, our lives seem to stay stagnant at the chapter where the clock stroked twelve - no glass slipper, no prince, no happily ever after. I look at my parents, my father, who works so hard to give my sister and I an education; my mother, who tries to earn more and more money to buy things she want which occasionally are for us. I asked my father, what were your dreams. He said he didn't had a choice. He had to work, for a pay, he said. I look at them, and so many other typical adults and I wonder, will I ever turn out to be like that? Dreams, aspirations, Cinderella's dreams were fulfilled, will mine ever be? Newspapers seem to churn out stories of successful people, entrepreneurs, people of the arts, chefs, those who had achieved their dreams. But how many people never get what they want... Is this the result of fear, fear of risk, not daring enough to dream, peer pressure, society's expectations, family obligations, financial problems...so many issues we face when we talk about reality, a place devoid of fairy tales and fantasy, where an assured path to happiness never exists. I'm so pessimistic ain't I? haha.

Okay, looking on the bright side, if we were ever so daring to dream, and to put our dreams into reality, we can have a choice. I don't want to have to tell my children (if I would have any:)) that I didn't had a choice, simply because I didn't give myself the chance to choose. "If you work in a job you love, you never have to work a single day."

And so be it:) I will work hard and minimize any chances for regret. I will stay happy and love the people around me.

Mmmm...a blog is so much less private than a personal diary, something I used to keep before the millennium of technology. Just a random thought, would it be shocking or pleasantly surprising if I was to one day allowed to see all the visitors to my page? :)

Alright, update soon:) All the best in your career decisions!

2010-06-19T21:27:00.002+08:00

Hey people! Life's been full of books and words! I'm sure it's like that for most of you too! Hopefully..heh..

On Wednesday 16th of June, there was a gathering of friends at Raffles City, City Hall. With smiles of enthusiasm and joy spread across their faces, the boys and girls decked out in similar costumes of white and blue scattered in pairs throughout the mall, each racking their brains for activities that will interest their honourable guest on that day.

The attendance was meticulously marked and each arrived pair was ~~smacked on their butts~~ rushed by Grandmother Nan to their assigned stations. Spirits were ~~hidden in bags~~ high and everyone was keyed up for the activity that was to come!

After what seemed like an eternity, the call of the millennium finally arrived! There was a moment of panic as everyone rushed into last minute preparations!

The honourable guest of the day finally strolled into Raffles City, innocently unaware of ~~his impending doom~~ the bundles of surprise awaiting him! He moved from station to station, magically gaining a year in age after sharing much enjoyment and laughter with the stationmasters. There were challenges and hurdles too, but with a lovely companion by his side, he was suddenly filled with strength and courage, as he braved the storms that were to come.

He tried on thousands of garments, tasted unusual words on his tongue, and even painted his face in blue and glazed his lips with (rose) pink!

The day seemed to rush to an end - the hours flew by as the honourable guest raced towards his eighteenth year.

The lovely companion arrived, breathless and blushing a lovely pink. "It is time!" she announced. ~~Muggers in burger king~~ The boys and girls tidied their brushes and parchments into sacks and slung them onto the back. With pennies came bread and drinks, which were packed into their sacks for dinner later on. And off they went, for the march towards the final destination!

Anticipation filled the air, in the magical garden that was all flowers and streams with their tiny waterfalls. A beautiful cake nestled in the hands of Grandmother Nan, which gave it tender loving care! Excited screams of "He's coming! He's coming!!!" caught everyone up into a frenzy!

The honourable guest appeared, accompanied (forever and ever) by his lovely companion! The boys and girls burst into song, with Master youngyee for accompaniment. Voices, high and low, old and young, blended into one as our present for our guest ascended towards the clouds!

He was made to cut the cake and then nanda beee cut the remaining cake and we all ate cake and then we all sat down and ate dinner then people started to leave and then I went home too! :D It was a really nice fun day and I was glad I got to see everyone! Miss you all! :)

We had a class dinner on Friday! It was quite nice. After the dinner at Burger King, we strolled down to the waterfront outside the esplanade and sat down for a talk. There was even a plan for a class chalet!!!! :D Hope it turns out successful!

Alex, Carolyn, Jolene and I went to study in SMU today. It was a productive Saturday! :)

Sigh...sharing giammie with mr loh is not very nice....*grumblesgrumbles. YOU ARE A LUCKY GUY.

2010-06-04T21:41:00.003+08:00

Heys! I went to school today to study!

Met Dean in the morning, he went for his lesson, he came back and played the com, nanda beeee arrived, alex arrived, we ate thaipan lunch, then we tried to settle back into studying:)

Who knows, out of the blue came robin ng! Marcus Loo also came by to pick up his A level certificate. We didn't do much work after robin came cos he was so distracting! (oops!) :)

Then merilyn came and we ordered thaipan dinner! :) We ate then played taidi for a few rounds before I finished my last set of market structure.

Nanda beee left after our dinner and the rest of us left the choir room at around 8.30pm:) Merilyn pangsehed dean for binng and they went parkway tgt.(O.O) Dean missed his 135 cos he was in lack of coins and alex and I went home after he ~~kopped~~ borrowed coins from us.

mmmm.....I need entertainment! Sigh. I need to study too. If our lives really revolve around an 8 day week, I think we will still feel it with work. Seems endless for people who mug so slow like me. Sigh...

Feelings are a bit mixed at the moment, the pictures dishen took which dria just posted on facebook really brought back many happy happy bittersweet memories. I was just wondering when we will really get over choir and get on with our lives, and I realised that the answer to that question...will not be answered, ever, at least for me. You can say choir is like ecstasy, it makes you high and you won't wanna stop. But choir is much more healthier than a drug of course, it's like sunshine that brightens my world. It makes the flowers that lives in my heart bloom, it gives my music life, and paints my world with colours. It's the sweetest and most memorable journey that I have taken in my entire 18 years, and I will give up nothing for this.

It's incredible how hard it is for me to put down my attachment to vj choir. But with the people gone, the atmosphere will definitely be changed, it won't be my vj choir anymore...:) I guess you must be tired of seeing me yearn about the choir, don't worry, I won't type them out anymore, at least, not until a significant event occurs! haha. It's just this incident that happened today that triggered all these emotions again.

I think Dean and Merilyn were talking about the songs we performed for our openhouse last year. Then they talked about chengwei and the gaudette solo he performed, plus our year 1 chorus ave verum. Then nan said that was the first time vj choir performed for the first time as a year 1 batch 2009. Pocks was in the audience, and when he saw us, he cried. It was his birthday, and he told us that was the best present vj choir could have ever given him.

love you pocks, love you seniors, love you vj choir, forever and ever

2010-06-01T21:16:00.002+08:00

Hey:)

I had cereal fish for dinner as one of the dishes just now...and somehow, I was reminded of... the choir days..haha..am I too sentimental? The cereal smell somehow brought back all the memories of cereal chicken at thaipan, and also in school when we once ordered dinner from ms jancy and the ball almost hit jiaen's head. :) haha it sounds kinda weird and disjointed when I read it from the start of the paragraph! Chengwei and a few of the other guys, playing around with the ball after dinner at the long grass patch outside the choir room=)

The moment the memories hit me, so did the emotions. I didn't realise my life was so entangled with choir, could it even be unhealthy? sigh... you know this feeling of depression when you feel like nothing else matters anymore, what else in life holds for you, what are you living for, why are you even doing the things that currently hold your attention....

Well, dwelling on the negative thoughts, I really see no point in us studying so hard, all in a day's effort for just a pathetic slip of paper. I can't speak for others, but I know I don't understand most mathematic concepts. I just memorise, and to ridicule how the country's education system work, take a look at the aces that decorate my result slip. Forcing myself to study because I have to, because of the eyes that will banish me to a world of their disappointment and fall of their expectations, because of all reasons that have nothing to do with what I want.

If the society wasn't so demanding of qualifications, I will just go study some random subjects like farming and gardening:)

Graduating from junior college, moving into hopefully a local university, moving on, finding a job, building a family, growing old, death...

Seems like a motion what most people go through...sighh...so boring right..

But negative thoughts aside, I'm treating the mugging for CT 2s now as a payment for the enjoyment I will get after CT 2s, however short it may be. The mugging can also payoff for the past one week I've been out or the future days I'll go out and play!

I went studying with alex yesterday. After sieving through the many options in the small island of singapore, we decided to head towards school! :) I finished binomial yesterday.

To tell the truth, I'm school-sick. Meaning I miss school ah.. I don't know why though..could it be I miss the people that I have been seeing almost everyday for the past few months? Or could it be that I just miss the environment and the familiar surroundings in school.. To come to think of it, we only have 4 more months to be in school as a rightful student. Someone who actually has reason to be in school. Using the classrooms, the tables, the chair, right down to the toilet in the T block....yes I know I'm being sentimental again. I get so attached to places where I have beautiful memories:) I don't want to grow up, I don't want to face the world. I want to continue being a student where teachers will take care of you and your schoolmates will smile to you in the corridor. University is different. It seems to me, a place where people pursue their own individual degrees, their own paths...where in jc now, all of us work towards this common goal, A levels! :)

School is really more than choir for me. It's also the people, the atmosphere, the bonding between people sharing the same uniform and badge. mmmm....maybe I'm overstating a little, but somehow I feel bonded to schoolmates even if we don't really know each other. haha. maybe it's because of those few common memories...

Continuing on from negative thoughts aside, I think life can be as fun as how you want it to be! :) Organising activities to bring people together, creating fun in the family...depends on how you want to spend your time, meaningfully or not.

I will be going to school tomorrow again, seems like the year 1s have practice *wistful smile. But I think I will be avoiding them..dunno how though, maybe during altos sectionals I will escape to the classrooms. But on monday when Alex and I studied we were chased out of the classroom. We sought refuge outside the staffroom instead:)

A recount of last week's events:

Mon-A very fun class outing! A first time in L4D, went to the arcade and pooled! haha.

Tues-Did hbl at merv's

Wed-went to giammie's for bio proj hbl

Thurs-Shrek!

Fri-Vesak day with pocks, js, robins, ky, jiaen, lex

Sat-adhoc crc interview and nyjc concert!

Sun-piano lesson and tea at nydc bugis!

Adhoc and crc handover felt so final...I guess it's goodbye:)

mmm haven't been finding good books recently to read! sigh..a bit tired of the titles I have at home. Introduce me to authors you like! I crave for new volumes to devour...yumyum! haha.

The weather was thankfully cooler yesterday, though it has gotten slightly unbearable yet again! Thus my decision to escape to school after a day of melting at home! :)

quite a long post..cya!

2010-05-25T21:50:00.002+08:00

hey people! (*in an annoying orange voice)

haha.

Went to nyjc's concert on sat after the adhoc and crc interview:)

The concert was nice and interesting! The pianist for the musical was great! Asaph played the beast and this alto 1 girl ng jin played belle! She sang really well lo..haha.. heartshearts! Jia Min was the teapot Mrs Potts and Gloria was the cupboard HAHA! so cute toddling around with the awkward cupboard thing! Keita was the make-up artist!

Before the adhoc crc interview, we tidied up the room a bit. We swept a little under the sofa with white cushions. You should have seen the balls of dust. When we swept the room (unfortunately without turning off the fans), dust specks were floating about in the air.... Jo and I went to the banner painting area to wash our feet afterwards cos it was so dirty! *coughcough

There were some groups that were so entertaining we couldn't stop laughing! haha like the person who imitated a dog, and the one who imitated the cat! And the insulter who called debbie shortie! haha. Quite fun and interesting la. =)

I hope everyone can turn up for the time capsule on saturday! I really wish that we can all keep a memory inside to be shared when we meet up 6 years later. A tin with everyone's memories! :) don't you think it's really heartwarming to recall 6 years later? :)) yup..so I hope the second last official task of the adhoc in the year 2010 isn't going to be disappointing, the last being the year 2 chalet!:) (this activity is by us right?)

mmm...work and relationships can sometimes clash a lot. Because of how I work I usually offend people, being rash with my words and not knowing how to phrase them properly and amiably. I'm learning though, sadly the hard way, so I hope it'll get better...

My mother just returned from vietnam. After about 8 days or so..don't know whether to say this here or not...but, the atmosphere was so happy and relaxed and harmonious without her around. It's rather bad of me to say this right. sighh...

the weather is getting hotter and hotter!!!!!! gosh..

went to merv's for hbl today, going to giammie's for wed's and thurs's.

Monday was class outing! Super fun!! haha cos giam and I tried all the things we won't normally do on the same day. I had my first lanning experience! It was kind of fun! Now I see why people get addicted. But it's like a drug. Unhealthy and meaningless. So once in a blue moon can ah, not even occasionally. We also pooled and played in the arcade! haha:)) so funnn!!!!!

The world is so small!!! Or rather, Singapore! Cos when we were at this isle eating place in the shopping place beside pomo we ran into the choir guys! I think there were 5 of them...haha, giammi was so shy she didn't wanted to eat there anymore. *thudthudthud! But fortunately they went into the lan shop and disappeared from sight, which convinced her to remain status quo about our dinner environment. haha. so cute! merv accused me of blushing, but actually it was because my fever came back and my cheeks turned red again...on and off on and off, since saturday...but I think I'm recovered now and I FOUND MY VOICE:DDDDDDDDDDD after trudging through thousands of tomatoes, apples, vitamin C tablets, vegs, gallons of water, herbal tea, barley and HONEY RED TEA (bubble tea lurblurb)!

Oh my gosh I'm sweating just by sitting here and blogging. byebye. happy melting to youuuus tooz

2010-05-18T22:00:00.003+08:00

Hello hello!

The photo spam on facebook is SCARY!

haha!

Life at the moment is...catching up on work! Missed 10 days of actual school because of ponning and venice and sov!=)

SOV was beautiful. The memories that I had left the stage with that night, of singing together, holding hands, each and every glimpse of the audience, mr kwei, the backstage, rehearsals, costumes, mask, each detail...are all very delicious and sweet to me. Memories fade, and soon I may forget, but the feeling of singing with vj choir and what everyone means to me will last a lifetime.

Past the emo stage... It's currently Bio and Chem spa these days. Had chem yesterday, so it's bio tomorrow. It's also the choir's exco election! haha. I'm a little thrilled!

Because that means.....adhoc crc handover will be soon too!!!!! haha!!! FUN FUN FUN!=))

I miss choir lots and lots, not just the singing, but the people as well.=)

Be happy!

2010-05-07T23:11:00.002+08:00

I was slogging through the mountainous pile of email that built up and clogged itself in my hotmail just now. It is so tiring to read through important mails from the school, after a tedious chore of deleting junk mail and the like.

And yes, here I am, back from Italy, with really sweet memories that will not be dampened too much by the fact that we didn't get grand champs. It's the conductor's recognition of our effort that matters the most. We scored well for all three categories that we entered in, scoring 3 gold 6 and having the highest score among all the teams from 13 countries that participated in this competition.

Our No Man was the best I had ever sang. It will remain in my memory as the most pure, sweet and humane music I had ever heard. And I'm proud to have played a part in creating in. Thanks you guys for making me feel so connected with the entire choir ever. Love you guys:)

Brought back food that giam and I shared with the class as well as food for my family and friends and mr chong and souvenirs and presents. The toilets there had a horrendously extravagant fee of 1.5 euros can you believe your eyes?! The good thing was it was reasonably clean and all cubicles were armed with rolls of toilet paper!!

SOV is coming really soon. And I'm feeling a little...sad actually. Tomorrow is going to be the last Saturday practice. Can you believe it? I wonder how I'll ever get used to a lie-in saturday. Sigh...I'm sad. I don't want choir to end. Really. I'll miss everyone. :(((((

2010-04-24T19:45:00.002+08:00

I blog because I want to express my thoughts, my feelings and everything I wanna say but I can't. Actually I like people to read my posts because it allows them to know things that I don't and can't express literally in words=)

somehow my thoughts flow more freely through my fingers or an alternative, my pen=)

There's this friend in my life.. When we first started to be friends, I really enjoyed our friendship quite a bit because it brought laughter and joy into my life. I was quite happy about it. Then I realised that I started to feel that you were more than a friend. I talked to merv about it, and he tried to talk me out of it cos he had a bad impression of you. Haha. But no matter. After a while, what he said got me thinking. Was I liking the feeling or liking you? It was then that I decided I shouldn't be getting too ahead of myself. So I decided to reorganise my thoughts, and tried my best to be friends. Guess what, it worked for me(: but somehow or another, it seems like you stopped being a friend to me. Was the closeness of the friendship wishful thinking on my part? Or was that simply an image of you that you wanted to create for me? I really don't know. Friends...will treat each other as such too?

Relationships between humans are just so complicated. sighh...or maybe I'm getting too sensitive again.

The choir tees look a bit....not very nice..haha..but okay la I think=)

VS performance tmr.

Venice trip...hope my stuff all fits into my luggage! I'm really glad I still fit my leotards from dance last time! I have pink tights too! but guess I'm not gonna wear that underneath the gown. so weird with pink feet peeking from underneath. heh.

I hope I won't feel too cold over there. And my clothes...hope they'll look nice! Haha..at least..presentable! I'm vain too=p but I'm sure the rest of the girls have many clothes to show off too! OHOH. I hope I won't wear the same thing as another girl! haha.

alright, logging off soon, need to pack my luggage! and mug. =p

2010-04-22T22:18:00.002+08:00

hey guys! thanks for laughing at our adhoc video (GO ADHOC!) which made joce and I feel very happy cos our effort was worth it! At the same time, remember to chiong for the final lap WE CAN DO THIS! :)

Giam was rather unhappy today. And I was unhappy as well because I feel that I cannot relate to her, which made me feel like a bad friend, can't even help my friend share her troubles.

There are many small little wishes in my heart, and I hope they all come true:)

2010-04-21T23:41:00.002+08:00

Heeeelooo.....

Life's been really fun...and busy!

But happy as well.(:

We had a Chemistry test today, and despite my strong morals, I could not resist temptation and took many peeps at the paper earlier before assembly this morning. (thanks to sean:D) There were still quite a few questions I couldn't do as I didn't bother to find out the answers. Anyway, we should cheat convincingly. Right? :)))

Choir's been quite fun I think...the drilling is a little boring, but apart from that, I feel that Mr Kwei's pracs are getting more and more interesting! I particularly liked the practice today. I think I'm beginning to feel a bit more like how I did the prev year when we sang with seniors. Speaking of last year, during the combined sectionals for sops and altos when we were clearing up the fast part for can...ticumnovumbennnne....invociferrateone I stood together with carolyn and jolene beside me and it felt so much like last year...I feel so happy and warm inside.

Sighh..however, the adhoc did a countdown thing to venice, sov and the day juniors step up, and the time I have left in VJ choir is so little...I can't believe 1 year past just flew past like that. I didn't know what my seniors meant when they asked us to treasure our college/choir life last year, but now when I finally do there's so little for me to treasure. *wistful smile

I wish that Venice will still be a month away, and I wish SOV can be three months away or something. Choir ending so soon is so sudden for me. I believe it will be so for the people who have sang alongside me as well...putting their heart into singing their very best and wanting the very best for this choir. Well...maybe I shouldn't start getting so emo beforehand la..wait till the time comes I think..(:

Been talking with yongkee quite a bit, got to know some of the juniors more, a great part played by the combined dinner we had tonight to celebrate Astrid's birthday. Happy birthday girl!(:

The 10 noms were so nice and did Italian dictionary booklets for us so we could converse in Italian over there! (or try to anyway haha!) I wish I know how to properly pronounce the words though! I think my copy wasn't very nicely done....haha yongkee decorated it merilyn said. And there's a power ranger infront wonder who did that..=p

I have been wondering about things these few days, whether or not I should trust people so freely. Or I should stop having expectations about people, but that would mean I might just keep giving and giving and giving and I don't expect people to return anything and sometimes I think I might just dry up.:( Maybe I should be more stingy with my love. If I don't love my friends so much I won't be so sad when they do something to make me sad. And giammie would feel that my love will be so special cos I will not be giving it out so often anymore. Sigh..butttttt....I don't think I can do it. Come just give me tears, I'll rather have tried then lose an opportunity to be friends.

Dry hair dry! This is one of the nights I wish I didn't had so much hair.

I really wish we can go to Venice and win the competition. Please please please.

Choir prac again tmr, hope it'll be a prac I'll like:)

byez.

2010-03-28T22:50:00.002+08:00

My previous post is so bitter. Guess I was really overwhelmed by my emotions then.

I shouldn't be so stressed and miserable. I think it's making me fall ill. During this crucial period somemore. Sighh..

Work work and work. My week will be so filled beginning from tmr.

H3 plus choir on monday,

choir prac at 530 on tues,

choir prac on wed,

H3 till 530 on thurs (aptitude test?)

go do passport on fri

choir prac and bbq and music fest audition on sat

piano lesson on sun

and in the midst of this I need to find time to go out and get a decent present for my angel-mortal before sat and practise music fest song and do the adhoc thing for choir and study for my aptitude test and practise my piano before sunday and GET WELL.

sighh.. okay. Monday, after choir, I should go straight home, revise all I can, sleep early. Tues, same thing. Wed, if choir ends early, I hope we can practise our music fest song (haven't even chosen=.=) and when I reach home I'll do my economics essay on economic growth, the group one, then Thurs... I can't really do anything..have a lunch date somemore. Friday, hope the passport thing goes fast so I can go somewhere to get my angel-mortal's present..then....omg..I feel dizzy just thinking of this. oh manz.

I can do this! jia you!

2010-03-25T22:21:00.002+08:00

sighh..many things happened recently that suddenly gave me the urge to post. I can't exactly share my problems with anyone, which makes me feel really troubled inside. So if you happen to read this, then too bad. If you don't want to feel even more emotional, then go away now kay:)

Let's start with something easier, something I can handle rationally.

Studies: Bio and chem and math. Three papers have been given back to us already. I didn't really meet my own expectations for bio and math, math especially. Disappointment is an emotion that I need some time to get over. I'm not troubling over the fact that I got such incredibly disappointing results, but it's sort of like I've accepted the fact but you need to give me some time to get over it. I can't confide to my friends because I don't want them to think I'm hypocritical; "You scored so well and yet you're complaining to me? Do you even care about how I feel?" yup. But we have different expectations, so you not meeting yours should give cause for an equal degree of misery when I don't meet mine?

Choir: I really hope we will increase practice time, not only as a combined choir, but I feel so !!! whenever male chorus have practice and we get to slack. Even sectionals would be nice. I don't think the girls need less practice than the guys. You can't expect us to give the same standard as guys for SOV if you don't ensure that we practise our female chorus songs a comfortable time in advance. And to tell the truth, I'm still not over the female chorus thing. I was so really to chiong, to do my best, to just race and put in everything I have. But before I was allowed to, it just ended. Do you understand how I feel? Can you? Frustration, irritation, I don't know how to describe it, but may this be an opportunity to tell me how unfair life can be.

Choir's more strict, I like it this way. It should have been like this since the start of the year. But it's still not too late. All the way!

Adhoc: I can just let it be. Just leave it alone. Stop thinking of ideas to spice up choir. What's the use? Your members don't support you. What for delivering the letters? It seems like many of them aren't doing it. What do you have to do it? And get blamed for being inefficient when the people you sms to collect the letters don't respond? What for put my heart and soul into something others think is unimportant, unnecessary and redundant.

I know, we're a committee. We shoulder a burden together. I really don't mind sharing blame together. I really don't. But what have you done to give me cause for this sacrifice? Do I deserve the blame as much as you do?

Friends: I really can't take it when people I thought are my friends start to dislike me. As I've told giam, I don't need people to like me. Just don't dislike me. Don't misunderstand my intentions. I hate the word irritated. It hurts me a lot. Irritation is worst than hate. Irritation is just something you feel when you don't feel anything for the person anymore. At least, at the point in time when you feel irritated. I'm really so confused. Is it worth sacrificing so much for choir?

For friends reading this, I hope you understand that when I turn around to ask you to keep quiet, or when I ask you to hurry up, or when I tell you to stop sms-ing, you don't think I'm a b***h. Cos I can't put rationality and relationship together. When I get serious, I can't fit relationship into the picture. I may end up becoming someone else altogether, so I hope you understand that outside choir I'm still the same.

What an emo post. My blog's been dead for so long I doubt anyone would read this=)

Jia you choir!

2010-02-23T23:30:00.002+08:00

So many things are happening nowadays, it makes me feel dizzy sometimes. I don't know how to think sometimes, whether or not my thoughts are going in the right direction, whether or not my thoughts are wrong. The more confused I am, the more cautious I get, the more mistakes I make.

My thoughts affect my decisions, so I ask for forgiveness if any of my actions/speech has affected you or offended you.

I really want to become someone that is more sacrificial, kinder, more considerate...you know, more Christ-like? But it seems like I'm still a horrid girl, no matter how hard I try to change, to think better thoughts, to refrain from straying down sinful paths, giving way to impatience, anger, and thus executing(woah) wrong actions that might lead me down a path of regret for a long time.

I can't help but be slightly emotional now. It's so stressful, with CTs hounding my back, with all the frustration and pressure that I feel in another area of my life, with my illness stopping me from singing my best, problems of relationship with people (friends, family).. But I guess these problems are always existent. It's the attitude that we face them with!

So we must be optimistic, have trust, believe in ourselves, and never give up! What a nice moment for a sudden omph for success! Jia you for CTs you guys, let's make Venice even better than the Austria we could have had!

2010-02-16T22:56:00.002+08:00

CNY's came and gone.

With abstinence from all cny goodies, gallons of brown liquid and hours of rest, I hope to be able to utilize the full capacity of my lungs tomorrow during CHOIR!

It's really been busy. Just look at my posts. haha. All the best guys and jia you for As and all you do!

Hope to be able to post soon! cya!

2010-01-31T22:43:00.001+08:00

haha orientation's been FUN so far!!

really cool!!

=))))

SHENKUU IS THE BEST!

AND S8 rocks even more!

Love you guys and let's make orientation 2010 a blast!!!=))

2010-01-27T02:18:00.000+08:00

Hey peeps, life's lil overwhelming right now.

I feel so suffocated. And stressed. I want to have a long long talk with a wise nice person(:

I shall see you around if I do.

2010-01-17T21:45:00.000+08:00

3rd period pe, H3 bio, choir, ogl training.

Split me into 4 please.

They're all occuring on the same date, clashing exactly with one another. If I was to go for 3rd period pe and H3 bio, I will miss og training on monday. Immediately after H3 bio, I will have choir. Did I take up too many things, much more than I can handle? sighh...

I had my piano class today. and I fumbled so so so so many times that I feel so ashamed and guilty. ARGH. If you wanna know what a nervous wreck refers to, it would be me, trembling up there sitting on the piano chair.

Alkenes, 8.4 Integation, Periodic table chem test. School HAS started. I need to get my gears running.

2010-01-09T20:58:00.000+08:00

I often wondered how it will be like, if I could read people. Then I wouldn't misunderstand their intentions, or say wrong things that make them turn away.

Relationships between humans can really be complicated and confusing eh?

But I hope I will succeed, in trying to be simple, plain, to people(:

It's just a day more to the start of school, today being Saturday. To tell the truth, I'm looking forward to it. I did question myself about the reason for my anticipation of monday. I think it's because I can finally start learning something new, and to be able to fall back into my routines(: of seeing my friends almost everyday, of laughing, joking, chatting with them..I like seeing friends and waving or smiling to them along the corridors because it makes me happy that they smile back at me:) I like talking with my friends because I like it when they talk back with me..

I like school because it gives me pleasure in learning, play and relationships(:, with teachers, classmates and schoolmates(:

And may I finish my holiday homework in time for monday as well. haha.

2010-01-04T20:13:00.000+08:00

hey guys!

It's the first post of year 2010! Firstly, I think it'll be quite rare to post often in this year, much time ~~shall~~ should be dedicated to piano, studies and choir=)

How have your holidays been? It is almost over for me, with a greater part of it spent singing (and the time was greatly enjoyed), and a much more negligible part spend studying and practising piano=)) I'm quite worried about my piano playing, it seemed to have gotten backward with all that neglect it had been getting throughout the year. My fingers aren't nimble anymore and they tense up at weird moments, making quite a lot of passages irritatingly uneven and unmusical. Unmusical because, this infliction seemed to have spared my left hand, so when the right hand notes don't match my left hand ones, sometimes the notes clash. Patience! So I've been trying to make up for it by practising everyday now=) wouldn't want to mess up like the previous time! There'll be another class on 17th jan, and another student and I, after our playing, will be preparing a bbq for my teacher and her younger students. Cos our teacher's not too sure about bbq stuff so she enlisted our help.=))

When I was little, I used to devour storybooks! Like at least one a day! Until secondary school came and my leisure time was drastically shortened, I had my eyes glued to a book every morning (for afternoon sessions) or every afternoon/night(for morning sessions!)=) The stories were fascinating, it threw me into worlds of fantasy with breathing dragons and dazzling princesses with glittering diamonds weaved between strands of their golden tresses, it brought me all over the globe, back into the past where cars and television had yet existed... Not all stories were nice - occasionally, there were a few that had unsatisfying endings. I love to write, especially in the past where children had so much free time, I would write short stories, poems and change the endings of stories I didn't like to one that would make me smile in satisfaction, the kind of endings that we once believed in, happily ever after:)

Reality isn't that kind, I can't change the outcome of things I don't like, and the lessons to be learnt from mistakes can be quite hard.

Just one more year to go..and I'm already starting to feel the loss, of the transition from student to adult. Yes, our seniors be sympathised with, for they've lost the privilege of student fare on public transport! :D

A level year ain't gonna be easeh! haha. Just stay optimistic and all the best in the new year!=))

2009-12-31T16:24:00.001+08:00

The last day of year 2009:)

It has been a really memorable year for me, made special by the friends I've got to know this year. I've grown rather attached to several of them, and the happy times we've spent together has made 2009 a journey that I'll never forget=)

Even for the ones that sometimes pretend to be mean to me and tao me, I love all of you!=))

I pray that in the year yet to come, I'll make even more friends, with the juniors=) and not be so stressed that I turn hostile and bite all those around me. haha. Jia you for As, and...I guess I will have to be resigned to the fact that I'm becoming a year 2 in the matter of a few hours!

Will be going to jia en's for sleepover soon=)) sighhh I feel old already!

All the best to our year 2s as well, jia you in your life and all that you do. You shall always be our seniors!:)

2009-12-29T19:58:00.000+08:00

hey!

Life's been really busy at the moment! Caroling's just over - it ended with grand reunion on the 25th dec, on christmas day! The singing during Grand Reunion was fabulous, it sang right into my soul=) Christmas!

Now that Christmas is over, we have been preparing for the choir concert which will be on the 30th dec, that is, tomorrow!=) I'm glad we managed to not anger mr kwei during our most recent practice; he's rather terrifying when he's riled!

I went to merv's on the 27th (I think it's sunday) for a bbq! I met tracy, jess, si'en and mok there as well! I made three new friends, linda, ivan and kasish(I'm not sure of the spelling buttttt I think it's pronounced this way)! We ate lots and lots of food! Thanks merv and merv's parents! We prank-called several people, one of them giam! haha.

Speaking of giam, she's BACK=))) I think we've grown much closer after the genting trip and I feel really happy whenever I think of our friendship!

I think money is evil. Because it makes people evil. If there was no money in the world, people will not abandon themselves to greed. Money brings power, domination, and the feeling of being superior. An addictive emotion? Perhaps the world would be such a better place if we didn't use money as a currency for exchange. If we lived in another world, where there is no currency, where everyone is lovely, kind and nice. And we could just walk out and buy things without exchanging in monetary terms, but something else, like I'll bake you a cake if I can have that nice piece of cloth. A little like trading=) But I guess that system was inefficient, hence a currency was created. Money. Money kind of stinks. My biology teacher once told us you never knew who had held that particular note in his/her hands before it got to you.

Sighh..besides, without bad people, we won't be able to appreciate goodness in people. I think people shouldn't be too nice. So nice that they compromise on their own happiness to grant the wishes of others. Perhaps sometimes it's good to make sure you get what you want too. Maybe that'll tell us what kind of a person you really are? Instead of being too easy-going, which makes it a little mysterious to guess at your personality.

I wish I can go through much more trials, so I can spot for myself my flaws and improve from there.

mmm I think it's not easy to speak to people. Not the debate kind of speaking, where you know your aims, and have memorised your entire speech, and have hypnotised yourself into arguing for nothing but a specific side.. but rather, the kind that people in position make, like a president, a chairman, or even a teacher speaking to motivate his class. Actually, to come to think of it, maybe all forms of speech can be the same. Have the aims in mind of what you want to address, and use that to ensure your speech is in your head, have confidence! =) I think. Well, I think I may be wrong too! haha.

Oh my, the piles of homework! All the best to you all as well!=))

2009-12-11T22:09:00.000+08:00

CHOIR CHOIR AND CHOIR!!

These few weeks have been fun, though a little tiring, but I don't mind it at all=) I gotta finish studying soon! To attempt the e-assessments. And start on my Maths project. It contributes 15% to midyears dudes! Better do it seriously! Finally we started on econs project=)

I started a lil on Christmas presents as well=) I hope tmr's choir will be nice and fun! =)

It's been a little insecure, without carolyn, bel and jolene on wed prac! and with Eunice unsure of carols, I suddenly realised my independence on others. I MUST BECOME AN INDEPENDENT SINGER! Miss giam lots=(

2009-12-08T21:59:00.000+08:00

On Monday jiaen alex fangqi lyn and I went to parkway for dinner=) pastamania.

Busy with choir pracs and we just had farewell for choir. Econs project is getting postponed time and time again.

Got some christmas shopping done with jia min today. I realised we forgot to take pictures, so..I shall apologise here=(

I'm tired of playing these facades that I keep on long enough to deceive you and hopefully deluding myself in the end. It shadows the game of charades that we have so often derived amusement from, the difference between mine and ours is that this is a game that is endless for me, tides of addiction that I drug myself on, to survive the hypocritical smiles that decorate my face.

I'm sad. Whatever you want to be and can't be. Friends matter to me so much. I guess I shouldn't let my guard down and start becoming real friends with people. No matter what, I should have never allowed you a chance to hurt me. Being detached, formal, cool, saying things that I don't really mean, not ever being sincere..I don't know if I can do it.

I'm sick and tired of taking the initiative. I should just keep my mouth wisely muted to save myself from all the trouble that I bring onto myself. The unkept promises that haunt me in moments of self-reflection really brought reality slamming right into my face. Vile loathsome creature. Bel said when I initiate something, it usually means I care most about it and so others will naturally depend upon me to be responsible about it. But I'll appreciate it if I get support (even moral support would be nice) from the rest, especially if we agreed to have it done.

I'm not a nice person at all. I want to treat everyone with trust and love, and I've been praying every night that I accomplish this task. But every time I trust, an additional barrier gets erected. Why can't you just say what you truly mean? Stupid stupid me. Once bitten twice shy. That's how it's supposed to be. I wish for an open mutual friendship. Maybe it's just me. Over-sensitive and emotional. sigh. Forget it. No matter what happens venus will not become mars, not will any other thing will it the other way. Reality is like an over-baked cookie. It's hard, tough to chew, and gives you indigestion and constipation.

I think I might be suffering from the giam-less day blues. She hasn't left, will only be on thurs, but still..2 whole weeks. sigh. How can I survive without your smiles that radiate truely from your heart, completed with touches of twinkle that light up your eyes? Sister, friend, companion, confidante and much more=) I shall miss you dearly. Do take care of yourself. And learn some digging skills in the process=)) miss me too!

2009-11-27T19:04:00.000+08:00

Just as I was mentioning about admiring the beauty of nature in my previous post, Hari Raya Haji presented to me a visit to HortPark!=) My maternal grandmother, my mom's siblings, one cousin, my sister, my parents and I went to Hortpark today to breathe in the scent of flowers, butterflies, insects and spiders=))

Bathed in the warm glow of the early morning sun, we strolled down a pavement lined with splashes of colour. It was flowers galore - the beauty of nature was simply breathtaking and dazzling!=)) You should have been there as well! There were odd looking flowers, dragon hedges, there were even hedges in the shape of merlions!

Much too soon, the caress of sunlight down our back soon gave way to a blistering hot wave of heat. With beads of perspiration rolling down our back and after giving the plants their much deserved praises and gasps of awe, we made our way back to the carpark and departed for a nearby food centre for a late breakfast=)

Pictures have been censored such as ones with people inside=D, but there are still many left=) enjoy!!

Pretty-looking odd flower=)

What a millipede!

Which curled up after my uncle went to touch it.

A pretty big flower!

And another!

Two lovey butterfliees=)

A statue! Admist...grass?

Star-shaped purple flowers!

2009-11-26T11:24:00.000+08:00

hello!!!

I cut my thumb washing bottles yesterday=( I was trying to cut away this hard aluminium-like foil thingy at the mouth of the wine bottle and it cut me instead=(. Washing bottles IS a tiring and tedious job! Merv certainly wasn't exaggerating when he told me that. Well...at least I didn't had to do the thinner part. Sniffing thinner leads to brain damage aye?

Woohoo!! I can wear the earrings I bought at novena (mon? or tues?) later tonight! =)) I wonder how it'll look!!

For mrs cheng's bio project, giam and I have been working with a schoolmate called timothy from s36. There were other people, 3 others I think, genin, regine or regina (I forgot) and one other girl who went for work attachment already. They left halfway through the project, so only giam tim and I continued. The bacterial conjugation one is almost complete already, we'll be looking at the results on monday=). As for the one dealing with bacteriophages and bacteria cells, we've just placed the phage with the LB broth together yesterday. Results out on monday as well.

I'll be going over to gran's for lunch later!=)

This morning I awoke at 7, had my breakfast at 7.20 which comprised of a charsiew pau and a piece of peanut cookie. Then I rested for a while, did some stretching, moving about, then finished a book that I was almost done with...I got changed and went downstairs afterwards for a 20 min jog=) I saw birds and plants and flowers! and people walking their dogs and grandchildren=D and crickets and insects chirping all around. What a wonderful world God has bestowed on us, and yet, how many of us actually enjoy the gift before our eyes, or do we simply take nature for granted? When is it, do busy humans like us, pause for a moment and drink in the beauty of nature? sigh..

I went back home, showered, cut my nails, cleared my sister's leftover breakfast (kids never have a sense of responsibility), blow-dried my hair, poured a cup of blueberry tea, wondered what to do, turned on the com. =)

I feel that the world is evolving too fast. It's becoming too metallic for my taste. haha..It's funny somethings how people just pop into your thoughts=) I was thinking of the previous sentence and could as if hear this particular friend say something sarcastically funny like "wow. you TASTE the world?" anyway..

Birds chirping!! I hear it outside my window!=) Sad that it has to be covered and interrupted by the roar of vehicles like huge heavy trucks passing by on the roads. Such polluted air, poisoning the very ecosystem in which we thrive. Humans are multiplying so rapidly. Do we bring destruction to the Earth? I guess we do.

I've found an answer to my questions, at least to some of them. I was reading this book, "The Shack", that giam had loaned me. Somehow or another, I could only read one or at most two chapters at a time. Today, I got another chapter into my mind. Humans weren't brought into the world to rely on their own judgement of what's right and what's wrong. A daughter dying, getting into a car accident, and other events we consider as misfortunes can actually be good things, we just have to trust in the Lord and not try to decide by ourselves what we should do and what we should not do. I'm sorry that I've been ignorant for so long, thank Lord for opening my eyes to your word. This doesn't mean I don't have my own opinions anymore, but just that I shall pray for guidance and pray that the things I do are not misinterpreted.

Talk to me if you want to=)

2009-11-24T23:24:00.000+08:00

hey hey!!

I bought new earrings today at novena!=D My first time there!!=))

I went to watch paranomal with giam claire joce jiaen alex binloh brandon and edwin today at cini's cathay. So boring! Not scary at all somemore=(( waste my $$.

Then we went to have dinner at this place at the basement and went home early=) I'll be going early to sch to wash bottles and complete my 4 hours from 8am onwards. Sighh...

Genting photos are all on fb!=D Lazy to put them here now.

Alright, I guess the genting trip really did make me a lil emo. I guess most things are fine now, at least, they are under control=) I shall be optimistic and stay happy even though it's a sad competitive I eat you you eat me world=((

I went for the ogl interview on monday and I really hope I passed the interview! well, mr kwei mightn't be pleased, but it's a once in a lifetime chance hoh. =) right?

Then my class and I went to east coast! Some of us had subway while others aka giam me wen hannah went to this hk express place a few metres away from subway. There was a singer and a guitar accompanist. The singer didn't know how to sing ANY of the songs we named. And to think he looks to be in his late twenties. He sings quite well for a cafe singer though=) hannah said she wanted to buy his album. We wrote a note to encourage him before we left. Haha. Like a bunch of lovesick girls la all of them. =DD

Afterwards, we proceeded to the beach and out came sparklers and light sticks!! Woohoo!!!

There were explosive sparklers and quiet sparklers but OBVIOUSLY everyone wanted EXPLODABLE SPARKLERS!!! HEEHEE.. It was so so so so FUN!=)) Thanks merv for arranging the class outing! And ZF for the camera which died out near the end. I haven't played sparklers in decades lo and that night really brought back some of my really treasured childhood memories. Wasn't it better when everyone was naive, innocent and true to oneself? sighh..alright emoing again...back to class outing, wen giam and I spammed the light sticks lo. Haha. Giam went to wear light stick earrings and made halos for me and wen. I had three bracelets each on my arm too!! haha. The sticks are still glowing know! I put all in a big circle at hung it at the head of my bed last night when I reached home.

And when I was walking to the mrt just now after dinner, merv asked again if we are free next friday for class bbq!!! ahhhh!!! haha! Love you merv! Thanks for doing so much!=))))

Alright, a bit tired. Hair almost dry too. Hope I see positive results for ogl interview tmr! Go try on my new earrings liao. BYEEz!

2009-11-22T22:02:00.000+08:00

So tired!! Have been catching up on the work I've missed from 16th to 20th nov in Genting.

"How was the trip?"

'Fun! But tiring." with a smile.

How untrue. Sigh. There are so many things on my mind now. Studies is almost the least of them.

Don't be affected by the emo post if you don't want to.

I really need someone to tell me how to be a nicer person, to be more humble, to be less arrogant and to be more christ-like. I feel so guilty about stuff, about putting my trust in the wrong person, causing misery to another. I feel so stupid and foolish for doing things that would have been better if I had not done it. I shouldn't have tried, but both sides are my friends..I don't know what to do..should I favour one side over the other..? I don't know what's right and what's wrong..it's so confusing!

I need some direction..oh my..i feel so fake. I'm this mean horrid person who puts on a false smile and be nice to people. AHHHHH!!!! Now I know why people cut themselves. Does it take away some of your pain? Does it?? ARGH!

Stupid stupid stupid me. I wish I know more things so I can do the right things. I wish I can know how to learn from my mistakes. I wish I can be a better friend. I wish I can...I don't know what I want to. Maybe it'll all be better if I just fade away into the background. Maybe I should learn how to love myself again..I should just disappear..

I don't know how to make interesting conversations, I don't know how to be jovial, I don't know how to care for people, I don't know how to be wholly self-sacrificing, I can't be the person I want myself to be. There's this bad side and good side and Satan wins most of the time. I feel so apologetic. I'm so sorry.

I wish I can go to sleep and never wake up. Or if I wake up I can start over again. argh.

2009-11-15T23:17:00.000+08:00

heyz!

going away from 16th to 20th nov.

I'm afraid that I'll get carsick. and homesick=(

and I hope I don't forget to bring anything important!!!

byeez.

2009-11-14T23:27:00.000+08:00

The packing and tea party and the odd stuff here and there is giving me a headache.

I'm going to genting on Monday!

And I'm really worried about not being able to catch up on my studies after that.

I've been so careless recently. I just left a line of red on the inner side of my arm. And I didn't know what caused it=( I just felt pain.

So many many weird balls of wool in life. Or worse than that cos wool unravels. More of like tangled up strings of wool. argh.

I'm a super mean and horrible person. If you open up my heart you can see all the ugliness inside=( stupid stupid stupid me.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-11-12T23:24:00.000+08:00

hey peeepz!

Today I went out to watch 2012 at vivo with my lovely classmates from the greatest class ever of 09s32!=))) The movie was nice, it kept me on my toes the whole time!! But the movie was quite long, about 2 hours plus.. but still nice! You guys should watch it too!

Then I met alex and fangqi at toa payoh mrt control station to go buy pjs! I FINALLY GOT MINE. But they look weird. Anyway.. the auntie gave me bedroom slippers=D cars theme.=DD

I went back to vivo afterwards to buy christmas stuff at daiso! The reindeer hairbands were so funnily cute! haha..Eunice and I chose reindeer hairbands, christmas hats, some gay mistletoe thing...haha...we'll bring for the choir peeps on sat! Jolene, Cavin and Jia en owes me $$! I'm broke=((

Okay going out tomorrow with alex to buy clothes!! and jiaen and carolyn too I think=)

wah it's late lo. go sleep peeps. I love you all *hugshugs

2009-11-06T22:36:00.000+08:00

Messenger forced me to upgrade to a newer version that is making my com run super slow. Sigh..

Today, I had OP from 8am to 3.45pm. Was completely exhausted! Mentally!! I reached school at 7.30am then and left at around 4.10pm or so with jocelyn and robin loh to buy pyjamas=)) We didn't managed to buy any, though we did find some... The ones at the pasar malam looked weird whereas some in OG were....erm...unsuitable. So... I think we might get them through reference by jojo at Toa Payoh..

We ended up at bugis and had lunch at the foodcourt!=) I had some jap food and so did joce. The both robins went to eat something spicy that they couldn't stand. =.= Alex had beef noodles and singgih had roasted chicken rice or smth like that=) Singgih is such a nice person=))))

Then we went home early cos I have to do some memorising for Q&A as well as write out my script properly. We went off in pairs, joce and singgih went to take the bus, robin and alex went towards joo koon, doraemon and I then went towards pasir ris.

I will try to memorise some parts of the songs we were supposed to memorise by sat later.

So tired! Are you? I'm so envious of those who finished their OP today! Then they would have the whole weekend to themselves to do I&R and stuff that they want!=( Sigh. Nvm! Mine shall be over soon too! On monday!=D

Choir's at 9 tmr *bloodshot eyes...sigh

Will not be having prac with conductor mr kwei at siglap cos of PW OP Full Dress Rehearsal from 2 to 5.30. So long eh..but I think I'll be going over to my maternal gran's for dinner! Yay! Got soup to drink!!=)))

I'm feeling a little tired. I shall go pack my bag and yes remember to SET MY ALARM or go BANKRUPT. and finish all the little things before I sleep. oh yes...memorising and reading Q&As. Alright. Cya guys soon=)

(I found a wrong word when I was re-reading! See if you are clever enough to spot it. It's not grammar, not spelling, but it doesn't make sense logically. haha.)

2009-11-05T10:20:00.001+08:00

heyo peeps!

I went to cut bangs! haha..it wasn't my original intention, I just wanted some fringe to prevent my hairline from receding, but the hairdresser mistook it as bangs...so well...it's a new look! haha..

I can't wait for the Genting trip! 16th nov to 20th nov!! haha. Though I shall probably be very bus-sick to and fro, up and down the winding path up when we arrive and depart. However, I believe that it shall all be worth it cos I'm be spending time with my lovely friends! =))

The first night's Christmas night! I want to do some props as a member of adhoc, so I shall probably ask the others soon about what we can do maybe this sat..otherwise a lil plain. We can do handmade stuff to be worn such as sewing felt together or red cloth or green stuff or something! I know there's no budget also la... but... I hope we can do something!

The second night's pyjamies night!!! haha...I'll need to go and buy pjs..and I think if there are no unforeseen circumstances that might hinder my intention to, I shall proceed to buy them on Friday with my friends ("family"?)

Choir's been alright, helping me not to slack. I think there has been too much free time recently, I don't even know how to spend it! I think I will go to Marine Parade Library today to try to borrow some books=) Otherwise I might just wither away...the days are a little boring, and I AM practising the piano everyday. Even so, I wouldn't be expected to practise all day long, that's a little too overboard for piano students like me=).

My crush with the person in bass is over. It lasted only 2 days. haha. So it was really just a sudden crush. But I will use this chance to lessen any misgivings/guilt/apologetic feelings you have towards me, it's alright really, I really wish there won't be awkwardness between us and we'll become really close friends=)) that's a wish only=). Maybe my liking another will make you realise that I've moved on, and so you can too. Don't think about the past and look to the future, right?=)

I'm meeting my group members in school at 1pm today for OP=) It's all going to end next monday!! Yay!!=))) No more PW for the rest of my liiiifffe=D

bye!

2009-10-31T21:45:00.000+08:00

There was choir practice today! I met alex and cc on bus 55 then I went to sit with alex cos cc's si'en's..haha..

Then we slept all the way to vj, then lugged our way to the choir room. Choir practice started with warm-ups as usual, followed by sectionals, then practice with mr kwei at siglap.

We went to cafe cartel afterwards for chengwei's birthday lunch. I spent $14! On lunch! I ordered some spicy chicken bolognese thing which was rather spicy after a while. People started leaving, and finally there was alex, jiaen, robinng, carolyn and I left.

Played stuff like I never, which got really personal at some point in time...truth and truth...haha...I didn't tell any lies, but maybe I didn't tell whole truths.

I know I will be over with you, I just have to continue what I have been doing, blocking my thoughts about you, stop myself doing things related to you, treating you as my friend, smile at you, joke with you, talk to you about stuff, forgetting all my foolish one-sidedness acts and thoughts... I wouldn't say that this had been easy, but I'm grateful for the chance to learn. To learn how to fall in love with someone, to realise that fairytales only exist outside of reality, to experience the heartaches and pain, prices to pay for being foolish, to learn most of all, to recover from the confusion, the stabbing pain when I see you with someone else, the days of being emotional, the moments of doing nothing but thinking about you, the turmoil when I have to look at you and pretend that you're my friend, the many and many things I do that I shouldn't have... to learn to get over you...

I have decided a few weeks back actually or was it the last few months... that I would like us to return to becoming friends instead=) I like us being friends:)

There's another person now, but I wouldn't want to go through the same thing I just got away from. So... I guess I should let nature take its course:) There shall be only 2 people who will know about this:)

Piano lesson tmr at 2, OP preparation afterwards.

Mon OP in the afternoon, wed and sat choir=)

2009-10-25T22:38:00.000+08:00

I went to Tampines Mall today for the Body Shop sale!!!=DD

I bought an eyeliner, make-up remover and passionfruit-flavoured/scented shower gel! I went with Cheryl Ang and...Gabriel. I felt so bright the whole while...

Then I went to Hafee's for project work, OP!

Just finished typing my script and editing my slides.

Going to go to school earlier to rehearse before 10 as the external examiner is coming tomorrow from 12 to 3.

I'm going to let the world and its events slide around me. I can't stop thinking about things, but I'll stop doing everything I've been doing. Cos I can't differentiate between what's right and wrong anymore. I don't know how to please the people around me. I'm sorry.

2009-10-24T21:38:00.000+08:00

Days after WR submission and promos are really funnnn!!=)

It was so great to see our WR out in print. That day, Yi jie, Hafee and I went to this place in bedok to get our WR printed. The lady there was really helpful and nice and willingly put up with our noise and troublesome orders=D Pei Wen/Giam/Hoon Suan/Hannah/Xing Yu's group was there too!!=))

It was like OMG! Our baby!!!! We had bubble tea after that as celebration! I had vanilla-flavoured bb tea, which tasted weird. We called Jia Jin afterwards to tell him that our WR HAS BECOME SOMETHING IN PRINT!! But well...he didn't get hyped up as us...

Speaking of baby, there has been so many songs we've learnt in choir recently.. (hush thee my baby!) During the periods ruby, our SL, wasn't around, robin.ng took us for sectionals. He literally flew pass the carols! I really hope I get them soon!

There was choir today as well. We had to sing this weird song with funny intervals with an odd lil melody. Mmm..whether or not it can even be regarded as a melody is a question by itself! Thanks ruby for the relaxing sectional!!!=))

Before choir today, we had a University Admission talk. I attended the NUS, NTU and SMU talk, but I skipped the overseas one:D. Didn't you feel so bored??=)) The situation is worsened especially if you're seating directly under the air-conditioning AND the fan. Why can't they SAVE ELECTRICITY and switch on just one? And to think they're all about practising what you preach and going greenn...

I've decided to work towards the goal of NUS! Though I'm unsure of what I'll be doing in future due to my ever-changing interests towards the subjects available, I'm certain that my choices will be either bio-related/econs/music=)

I've also decided not to take any H3 subjects. I am offered H3 maths and bio, but due to my ever-changing interests, I will try to keep my options open. What I'm really interested in is bio, but bio h3 is really gonna be tough, especially with KI, the reason being a research essay that we have to deal with the following year that takes up 40% of our A level grade for KI. The obvious option will be to drop KI and take up H3 bio, but I'm afraid I can't cope with GP! Just the thought of all that comprehensions/summary/boring composition questions send shudders down my back! To take H3 means I will HAVE to drop one H2 to H1, since I'm currently having 12 units. So in order not to cripple my choices in future, I shall try to keep everything open! Besides that, as I am someone who does not deal well with stress, why bring unnecessary misery to myself?=)) right? I would rather stay happy=))

I hope I can go out next saturday cos there's no choir!! Woohoo!! Thanks chinese people=D

And..I feel really guilty for not practising piano and occupying myself irresponsibly with idol dramas..the length of my fingernails tells you how long the piano lid has sat there collecting dust. It's time to flip it up again!!!

Goodbye peeps!! Jia you for OP!! Only a few more days!! (negative sentence, or a positive one?:))

2009-10-14T22:44:00.000+08:00

心願便利貼 - 吳忠明 & 元若藍

一天一天貼近你的心　你開心　我關心
一點一滴我都能感應　你是我　最美的相信

等不到　雙子座　流星雨　灑滿天際
先點燃　九支仙女棒　代替

最燦爛　不一定　要許多　鑽石黃金
看你眼睛　有幸福的倒影

把你的討厭　宅急便　送到天邊
平凡的傻事　用了心　變成經典

存滿滿的心願　便利貼　貼成無限
就是我們　最富有的宣言

把你的喜歡　每一天　複習兩遍
驚喜的預言　我的天　通通應驗

你和我的心願　便利貼　貼心裡面
收集感動　給以後懷念

一天一天貼近你的心
一點一滴我都能感應

你是最美的相信

occupying myself with ming zhong these few days! and pw and adhoc stuff=)

so many things to do recently=))

results are still alright, I think we might be getting back econs tmr. I did still alright for my KI essay..now it all depends on my short passages and my research essay. Hope I didn't screw them up!=)

It's late! We should retire to bed soon:) goodnight and sleep well!

I didn't know letting go would be so difficult... Time heals everything doesn't it:) what's the trade-off? Long term relief for short term agony? haha..

2009-10-10T23:20:00.000+08:00

This week was so fun, exciting, carefree and happpppppppppyy!!=))

After exams ended on monday, I went shopping with giam and pei wen at far east! Hoon suan couldn't come cos she had other commitments. It was so coincidental that all of us wore vests even though we didn't agree to! :D xin you ling xi!=))

I bought a pair of jeans, shorts and a darkdark blue dress that has a special lacy part at the back=) very nicccceeeee! And I bought a white deer necklace as well!=) pei wen also gave me my present on tuesday, a very nice cute piglet cup and a fluffy pinkish yellowish pencilbox! As it's too small I think I'll use it as my make-up kit! If you think pink is my favourite colour it's not ah! I'm getting a little tired of it as well! So don't bombard me with pink.:D

On Wed we went back to school for choir! I reached school at about 745 cos we were supposed to have an adhoc meeting to prepare the tea bags for openhouse to invite juniors to our tea party. We ended up helping sean to clean the choir room and started our preparations only at about 915 when eunice arrived.

Choir then started at about...10 if I didn't remember wrongly. We sang gaudette and ave verum. A little sian at the second song...but it still felt good singing together after so long!=)

After choir, we went to celebrate Jia Sheng's birthday! He was so clever to figure out the clues we set for him so quickly and he reached the correct destination in less than two hours! haha. Jocelyn and I were still anticipating that he will get stuck for a considerable amount of time! It was a scary experience as we almost got in trouble at esplanade rooftop for squashing plants.=.= so lame. they should have proper signs. that says you can't even walk on drains where there are flower patches beside them cos the camera will catch you and see you as killing innocent plants...

On Thursday! There was choir again..but I forgot what I did in the day...I only remembered I went home in the evening and had a nice rest=)

Friday! I reached school at the normal time cos there was farewell assembly for our dear seniors=) Then we had choir, then openhouse, then performance, then pocks celebration!

Today is Saturday and we went to giam's to bao dumplings! Merv and wen went too!=)) It was a nice experience though! My first time doing something cina! haha..I brought a box of frozen ones back!:D

I feel so confused cos you're my friend and I don't know what to say to you.. I really don't know what to do. You're my friend and I'm unhappy because of what you do and what you make me do.

2009-10-05T22:29:00.001+08:00

PROMOSAREOVER!!!!! ISN'T THIS GREEEEAAATT???!!!!

haha. Thanks peeps for all your presents and stuff! I like the cake container, the birthday songs, the birthday wishes and the lovely messages from 09s32! =))

We went to watch time traveller's wife today and it was so touching!! Yi Jie, Tracy and I were crying, with Tracy being the noisiest...haha but Nicole, Mervyn and Jess were all dry-eyed!

Here are the people that smsed me :

Shi Yuan<333!

Jia Min=))

Pockss! (you were one of the first three!:DD but somehow I didn't read your message as the first three...phone lag sorry=(()

Yi Jie^^

Ting<333

Alex=))

Tracy^^

Gillian^^

Yi Ying=))

Hoon Suan^^

Claire^^

Hui Juan^^

Zhen Fong^^

Ravleen:D

Han Sheng:)

BenitaO.O

Wen Siu o.O (emoticon of the century)

Sunanda=))

Jia EEEn:DD

Kayat(:

Manda!!

Laura<33

Jia Yan=))

Cat!!!

Jolene^^

Clara Lim^.^

Fishcake!!!

Mervyn:D

Brandon=))

Sherman:))

GIAMMMIE<333

Fishhie!!!

Robin Ng(:

Louisa<333

Isabellllll:D

Hung=))

Suet Far:)

Yun Ying!

Ling Yuan!

haha, not forgetting all the facebook wishers!!! (I hope I didn't leave anyone out but if I did I'm sorry to had!!!)

Thanks everybody! It means a lot to me=)) and made me feel really happy and treasured..hehe..

End of promos!!! I can't believe it's all over man! haha. Loves!!

And here's a special little part for a special someone:

Thanks for bringing joy, happiness, fun and laughter into my life=)

Looking forward to a life of freedom, happiness and FUN!=))

2009-09-15T20:38:00.000+08:00

Oh man! Blogger's finally alright on internet! I'm so gladdd:D Otherwise they have this weird text box thing and I can't even change font or upload pictures or videos or anything...could just type words.

But I wish it will stay this way until the end of promos, cos like how everyone's else's blogs are, mine is going to be frozen till our day of salvation!:)

Jia you peeps! We can do this!:))

2009-09-11T23:10:00.000+08:00

There's sooo sooo much things to do..=((((( I wish I can pack promos in a cardboard box and leave it outside for the garbage van to pick it up. Then it'll go through the incinerator and vanish. Never will it plague young minds again.

I'm always in fear of being misinterpreted or misunderstood. Have you ever been in the same situation before?

Why wasn't there the creation of a book on relationships with total accuracy? Sigh..But even so, everyone would know what the other is doing, and the book will serve no eventual purpose and we'll be again back to square one. Maybe we shouldn't change nature. And just let things be. I can't help it most of the time. Being me. I apologise for anything I've done wrong. I cherish the people around me a lot, so..actions/words said/done mean a lot to me.

You just didn't know how much your words stung. Go on. Keep throwing those small lil daggers at me.

2009-09-10T23:37:00.000+08:00

Hello guys!

The september holidays are almost over! Sigh..there's such so much to revise! And I'm so slow at learning, it hinders my progress even further.

I feel worse than during O levels. Firstly because we're studying even harder, and secondly it's more difficult than O levels..which of course is pointing out the obvious. A third reason would be I'm surrounded by people so brilliant that I can't breathe. Can't even pause to catch my breath. It's like a neck-to-neck race and whoever slacks just one second loses. Gosh..Talk about survival of the fittest...(evolution!)

I feel overloaded!!! I need recreation!

But I do have to thank my friends for providing me with much-needed laughter now and then..=) takes my mind off things for that moment=)

I want to watch the Time Traveller's wife! But they don't want to..they wanna study..the muggers=((

My piano teacher recently asked me to write a testimonial for her web, and I read her reply just now..She was so cute la...My love for music was ignited all because of her lo..
Teachers really do matter a lot..When I was in Primary 5, I had a form teacher that was so inspiring and caring that all of us obeyed her without question, not out of fear, but out of love and respect. We were 11 years old and the immature boys were usually impossible to handle, especially the naughtier and more irritating ones, but to her they succumbed. She helped to pull up my science and maths grades, which were like...band 2 and band 3, that was rather bad...and till now I still remember the impression she left on me which will be what I inspire to be if I ever get into the teaching profession one day.

There are many things in life which we want coveted, but we can't. So I've chosen to give it up. Since it's not mine, things can't be forced, so I should change my focus instead. If I can spend less time on my thoughts regarding the matter, I should be able to use the time on more productive stuff like revision. Speaking on revision, blogging is certainly not productive.

Sigh..

I shall retire to my books and continue hibernating. Jia you and stay optimistic! Just think that no matter what, it's going to be over one day or another. haha.

Loves, ME!

Sleepover/Mugging at fish's

2009-09-07T20:42:00.000+08:00

I reached fish's at 8 plus on Sunday night=)

It was studying all the way in the computer room in her house. I lasted till around 12.45..a.m.? haha. Cos I took a video at 12.30am:D

Then came Monday morning, I woke up at 7.30am, tried to sleep, can't, went to the toilet to wash up, waited for the rest to wake up while studying till about 8 plus 9.

Went to bedok's macs for breakfast then, followed by studying back in fish's house till lunch at 1. After lunch, things were rather slack..haha. Only studied for a while, then we started playing taidi.

Left soon after cos fish has tution=)

Here are the pictures and videos! If I have the time to, some are going to be on facebook, but the unglam ones will stay here. haha.

2009-08-31T21:18:00.000+08:00

Heyos!

Hi Brandon! haha. Congrats on finding my blog!

It was teacher's day celebrations today! I reached school at around 7 and started wrapping the presents for mr wong (our Chemistry tutor) and mr chong (the dedicated ct!)!

Thereafter, we proceeded to the parade square for assembly.

After assembly, it was breakfast time in the canteen! I forgot to bring bread. But who would want to eat bread anyway, so weird..plain bread. Zhen Feng was supposed to remind me last night to bring (I told him to anyway), but I guess we both forgot=) But we had oreos, milo, polar cakes and brownies!

It was so warm throughout the day which made me really sweaty! After the breakfast, we had the opportunity to enjoy a performance in the hall, with drama and dance groups, singing, bands (or to be accurate, A band), and video clips!

The theme for this year was flights and teachers went on flights, and had their meals, then entertainment on board. I thought it was rather cool, with the CTs dressed up as stewards and stewardesses..haha(:

The event ended nearing eleven, and claire, laura, shi yuan, geraldine, a new tkg friend delicia and I hurriedly made our way to TKGS!!

We saw Mr Peh, Mrs Liew, Mdm Azizan, Ms Tee, Mrs Loh...(did I leave anyone out?...) and the green audits teacher Mrs Lim-Neo! We gave some of them presents, chocolates from the cocoa tree sale!

It felt good to be back, remembering all the things we did in the past. The best thing was seeing everyone again back in school! It was so nice!! On bus 16 when we were making our way to TKG there were already so many familiar faces! It gives me a really warm feeling inside. Then in TKG with the familiar security guard whom I used to wave to everyday after school who still remembers my full name! haha..

Then when I was leaving the school with kailing, claire, laura and ting through the side gate, I recalled the days where we walked down the same corridor to the side gate, taking off our name tags and pinning them on the side of our belts=) *feels wistful

17 this year! Sounds old doesn't it? And to think I was still wishing 16 would arrive quicker in the past, which really seems to be just months ago, and not years..

Time flies! It really does! And I think we had never realised it till we got into JC. Spending most of our youth on education..

We left TKGS and went to the magic wok outside for lunch=) then we proceeded to the front gate to the busstop to take 16 (again) to grand cathay to watch a movie!

Claire and Kailing weren't interested in the movies screening that time and the movie that Claire wanted to catch hadn't came out yet, so only Ting, Laura and I watched Bandslam! It was really a nice movie though, but I realised the people you sit with realllllllyyyy matters a lot!

There was this bunch of lower sec boys (with shorts) that was sitting beside me with body odour, foul language and immature minds. They were swearing all the way and I seriously think they have minds with restricted vocabulary limited to vulgarities and 'hot', 'kiss', 'hot', 'kiss'. SERIOUSLY. BOYS. Can't stand them! And he kept shaking the seat. And talking loudly. PLEASE. Don't they know what's cinema etiqutte???

I'm never sending my children if I have any boys, to a school like that! I couldn't catch a glimpse of their badge though, although I did see that they wore really dark blue shorts..or was it because of the darkness of the cinema?

Anyway..after that bit of flawed memory of Bandslam, the three of us made our way home=)

It was nice to get together and catch up on events in life..like me telling them about him..and events in school..and everything..=)) I really like the warm nice homely feeling it gives me.

LOVE YOU GIRLS!!!

I never realised how I missed a girls' school environment, nor did I realise how accustomed I've become to a mixed school environment until it felt weird to see all girls around=)

Life passes..time and tide waits for no man..in this world we live in...let's strive to live our life to the fullest!

2009-08-30T21:21:00.000+08:00

I bought a new watch! Watched UP and Proposal! Both nice=)) Haha. And going back to TKGS tmr!
Recently a little stressed, especially in the emotion department. I've just handed in my research essay so that takes a little off the load I guess. I miss choir, I miss my friends, I miss singing, I miss life. Sigh, why is being happy so hard to achieve? A simple thing to have yet numerous obstacles to overcome to arrive at that seemingly impossible goal.

Why are people just so hard to understand? If you find that there's something that I'M DOING that is not PLEASING to you why don't you just spit it out so it's better for both of us?

2009-08-20T22:52:00.000+08:00

It's almost time for SPA!!! How cool is that...The arts students must be laughing at us=(

A mosquito bit me on the forehead last night and it made my eyes water when I applied the cream thing this morning before I left the house. I hope it wouldn't happen again tonight.

I hope tomorrow's choke ball will be nice..

And congrats if you found my blog..:D

2009-08-18T21:45:00.000+08:00

Tomorrow's the deadline for EOM! And I think everyone..almost everyone..is rushing it out! Inferring from the previous sentence, I would have you guessing that I'm in such a situation! haha.

Manda just asked me to tell her someone who can sing the Victoria song and of course, naturally, I gave her giam's number! I can't WAIT to hear giam sing man!!! haha..thrilled indeed!

Today there were red bull people at vj again. Not technically, but they were outside the gate..you know the path that we will walk along before reaching the zebra-crossing? yup. And I saw this really really small and cute red bull car!!! Its cute size made it cute for one, and it didn't had a roof! So nice right..feeling the wind in your face:))

Okay, can't linger long here..the general for defence or something is gonna talk to us tomorrow..uuuu...haha..(random) bye!

2009-08-17T22:09:00.000+08:00

Heyo guys! I recently changed my blogskin!!!!

Okay, the past few months have been sort of a tough period, with the emotional rollercoaster and all...I'm much better now..and we've just gotta strive out a balance between work and play!

Mid year results are as follows:

Bio - E
Chem - E
Math - B
Econs - D
KI - E

A rather poor effort I would say. Yet, since econs and bio weren't counted at all, the primary reason for my lack of motivation you could say, had possibly lead to the poor results. However, this might just be an excuse. So what I have to is to mug harder! Not forgetting the balanced lifestyle of course!

Choir's paused for the time being, allowing its members to focus on preparing for their promotional exams. I really hope I do well this time, as promotional exams count 100% since without mid years.

For the relationship part, I love Cheryl Giam! haha..it's rather cute actually. Today we had connect three with mr chong today together! He advised us on study habits and we conversed a little on things regarding school life, CCA and about the class.

I'll name him HIM/HE when appropriate okay. Actually now...I'm not sure about what's my stand. It feels like a post kind of feeling, but yet.. I'm just a little confused about what I feel now. Sometimes I worry that HE is too young for me..I think a lot..about solemn things that perhaps people of our age might not want to think about. I don't know..does everyone worry about competitiveness in the society and complusive mugging? Or thinking long-term to invest in shares now so as to be financially prepared in future? I don't know..maybe everyone does. Then it'll be okay if HE does. Another thing that worries me is I puzzle at some of his actions..I don't understand them..

If we were like pieces of puzzles, if one piece couldn't fit nicely into the other, they can't form up. Another piece will have to replace that odd one.. Sigh..the messed-up mind of ME.

The worst thing is that HE actually knows...how terrible can this get. I think HE'll never find this? So..by waiting for me to broach about the subject/waiting so long that I had to do it, it's a little immature of HIM. If it was the other way round..(if I could so much as to flatter myself), I would definitely not leave the other party hanging..

The many tests, exams, projects..ARGH!!!! PW is DEFINITELY a waste of our precious youth!

As I condense into a milder state of emotion, I shall end off now. All the best in studies! Till next time.:))

2009-07-07T22:17:00.000+08:00

I really dislike myself. I should hide the ugly parts in a box and throw them away. The first part of the previous sentence always occurs, not for the second part though. Facades facades facades. I HATE YOU!

Emotional outburst over and done with...mid-years open with KI tmr, from 8am to 11am, a long tedious three hours of critical thinking. Performances are over as well...savoring the last opportunity to perform with seniors.

As I get back onto the road of a studious life..

2009-07-04T21:20:00.000+08:00

I feel so emotional now..I should mug and mug and mug. It takes my mind off things. I feel like playing all songs in minor keys. Rehearsal at esplanade tomorrow, taking away my study time. Well..if anything good could come out of this it should be me focusing on studying.

The weather's back to being hot again.

2009-07-03T21:06:00.001+08:00

Performance on the 2nd (yesterday) and 6th (monday).

Unlucky thing for it to come now. sigh..

I must be a better person. And study hard. And accomplish the things I want to in life. I understand what you said about studying..or at least, I think I do. Studying takes my mind off things. It helps me to forget... for that moment at least.

I can't face you anymore. Each time my glance slides onto you, and I look away, it seems as though I'm torn into two..I don't want to think that way anymore..I want to forget..I need to forget..but it's so hard to. Why did this ever existed?

2009-06-29T21:56:00.000+08:00

heyo, I'm back! haha..

jc's been really busy..there's really no time to do anything fun and yet it is this age where we're supposed to enjoy our life best.

I found that my life has been revolving around choir choir and choir. It's not that I don't like it, but I find that this strong attachment I have towards choir might take a huge chunk out of my life once it's gone, making it incomplete and unwhole (if there's such a word).

Emotions emotions and emotions. Wonder if this is a blessing or a curse. Emotions are things that are unique to the living soul, it differentiates us from lifeless objects in the universe. Emotions enable us to feel the world, to taste its sweetness as well as testify to the cruelty of reality. They allow us to feel joy, the wonder sensation that brings spring into our step and hangs a smile across our face. Alas, they can too, drench us in misery, in dark pools of melancholy, where there seem to be no way out....sucking you in and draining you dry...

Being sixteen slash seventeen is a great experience...it shall be the place where I will grow up..

Midyears are cancelled for us because of CCA involvement! =) Our choir is performing on the 2nd as well as on the 6th, coupled with rehearsals close to these dates. Well..not exactly cancelled, but more of like if we want to count it in with our promos we can, which means that if we do well for mid years and want to count them, we can=) or if we flunk our papers, we can choose not to count them instead=) school's gooood to us!

Choir room's addictive man..it was that place where I learnt bridge from, spent the holidays mugging, the breaks socialising, playing the piano, resting, sleeping, kept my stuff in my locker, made friends...

See? My world is dominated by choir. I was recently given the honour of being in adhoc and I will certainly treasure this opportunity to being much more fun and excitement to choir! Somehow this feels like a prepared speech but I assure you it isn't.

Being in a mixed school is great I suppose..in addition to the ogling of guys *gasp (haha jk), there's much more variation in comments, opinions and behaviour. I also find that guys think in simpler terms than girls..as such, they're easier to communicate with as I find that their actions have less malicious intents behind them. or perhaps they're just better in concealing their motives..who knows...the world is a complicated place to thrive in.

Somehow now I'm not really presenting my true self to people..I'm afraid of rejection yet again. I'm just going with the flow and quoting someone "to not offend as many people as I can".

My class is great, with a super cuuuuute guy inside! haha. He was originally from tj, his name is chia chiu, if you know him. Well..but as the days go by, his cuteness seem to diminish..hehe:D

Now that choir has replaced dance, I have found that it is very easy for me to add those additional pounds onto my already inproportionate (if there's such a word) weight!!I must exercise! As a matter of fact, Claire and I already have a pact to swim after the midyears. SWIM! and I've been trying to keep my flexibility which has decreased horrifyingly by a great amount by doing splits and jumps and redoing all those dance routines that we used to do e.g.corner to corner..

I look fat now..horrors! I'm very ashamed of myself..and yet I can't stop myself from chocolate-fying myself! I'm sad that's why=((( and chocolate makes me happy! =)

BGRs..I wish something else happens soon...

2009-03-18T10:51:00.001+08:00

JC life is really busy!

I don't even have time to blog, let alone read others' post. sigh..I will be declaring my blog half-dead from today onwards, as choir+studies+piano+tution is really wearing me down. =(

But you know I still love everyone of you!!!!!!!! *hugs and kisses

stay happy and optimistic in everything that you do!

2009-03-09T13:54:00.000+08:00

Today's MONDAY! KI lecture is cancelled! haha. Which is why I suddenly have the time to blog! haha. Most of the class's guys are here. And they are indulging in computer games. Typical.

I have choir later at 5, so I should be going off to revision now right? =)

If my blog turns dead, please forgive me, for there's REALLY no time for computer usage, with piano, studies, tution and CHOIR which is on 1 3 6. Till 7 plus somemore...sigh.

I played at a masterclass on sunday with debussy. It was quite bad, for I did not practise enough due to commitments such as (as mentioned above). Mr laurence was the one guiding=)

There's another masterclass at NUS on tuesday!

(To bio revision and PW work)

2009-02-26T17:11:00.000+08:00

HBL today! My eyes sooo much from using the com for sooo long.

I would rather have lessons in school! Though it's quite cool to experience a virtual classroom (once in a blue moon).
If this continues, I'll turn into a big fat PIG! cos I stuff myself with chocs and sweets infront of the com during lectures AND tutorials=) with my Valentine's chocs which came in good handy!!

Speaking of PIG, it got raped in school. =( stupid male cat.
GUYS' fault.

Back to writing my PE essay. yes, you didn't see wrongly, PE ESSAY. =.=

2009-02-24T22:11:00.000+08:00

heyo! finally! I'm blogging! What an achievement it is to me! Really. And please, to clarify jovi's tag, I wasn't dating him, I merely invited him along to watch a piano concert with him. =p. Stop misleading people, jovi. =p

Econs is really difficult, but demand and supply is so much easier to understand then free market economy and all those stuff...

It's only been like 2 weeks, but it seems like months have been spent in school! I'm really grateful to the one who organised the 4/6 monthly gatherings! Kudos to you!!! *hugs

Sometimes I wonder if it was better if I live in a nunnery instead.

2009-02-15T21:22:00.001+08:00

School has been busy like siao....

This is one of the tasks that we have been set:

Dear YQ,
It has already been two weeks in Victoria junior college! Orientation was fun and it has definitely allowed me to bond with other Victorians. Lessons have officially begun and I am trying my best to adapt to the tutorial and lecture system so foreign in a secondary school.

It seems as if only a moment ago when we were still in secondary school, yet now it is time for us to really sit down and ask ourselves where our future path lies. I know that these two years would be a busy period, requiring wise time management and much determination and discipline in order to reach the targets and goals that I have set myself.

I would want to be able to excel in my CCA, choir. Choir is a very demanding CCA as members do have the responsibility to live up to the reputation of being world no. 7. As I was not in choir in my secondary school, I have realized that I do lack behind in terms of skill when I sing as compared to some of my other choir mates. Even though this means more hard work on my part, I believe that if I am determined to master the art of singing, I will be able to sing as well as them one day.

Academically-wise, I hope to be able to graduate with at least 4 As. This would demand quite a lot of effort as it is not easy to achieve an A grade. I realize that it is very important to manage my time wisely as ever since I became a Victorian, I have felt that 24 hours a day is rarely enough for me to accomplish my tasks set for that day.

I take piano lessons privately and since school started, I have not managed to find time for piano practice. Due to the lack of practice, I have not been meeting the expectations of my piano teacher.

My learning obstacle is often the difficulty I have of prioritizing my tasks. I would more often than not end up with everything half-done as I am unable to make myself leave something entirely undone. However, I have been telling and teaching myself how to differentiate between the really pressing tasks at hand and tasks that I can afford to put aside for the time being.

With such a fully-packed schedule, life in VJC will definitely be eventful. On the other hand, if I do not make the right decisions or if without proper time management, school would be a very stressful place to be in.

Some personality traits which I dislike myself having would be my indecisiveness and the lack of discipline to carry out tasks efficiently.

As they say, we only get to live our life once, so we should always try to make the best out of it and live it to the maximum. I sincerely hope that these two years will enable me to grow into a better person and allow me to graduate with beautiful memories.

I don't have time to plan anything more, so this is it. =)

2009-02-07T20:44:00.000+08:00

I'm sunburnt and ache all over.

So, externally, my skin is burning painfully (weird description) and internally, it's the time of the month and with it comes a lot of cramps. I went for dance audition yesterday and combined with the sea carnival, my muscles are protesting in their own special way. Ouch.

Anyway, orientation was FUN!

Although the first day was a little quiet, the rest of the days were filled with much FUN and EXCITMENT!! I LOVE REYBEL!!!! AND REYDAR (of course). Mass dance at suntec was FUNFUNFUNFUNFUN!!!!!!!!!WHOO!!!!Crazy...ahharahhar....Whineywhineywhineywoo!

I haven't had so much fun in a long time!! Especially after the hectic cramming for Os, beginning from sec 3. We went to the beach on friday and it was the first time I went down into the sea and really played so much!! There was stuff like tug-of-war, (whatelse...)...my memory is failing me. Sorry. Next.

I signed up for so many CCAs during the CCA walkabout like guitar ensem, piano ensem, choir, dance, harmonic, ..... Our VJ seniors were so ingenious! They set up a booth promoting a fake CCA, body-building, and tricked people to sign up! Then those who signed up kena got called up to stage to strut their bodies about! HAHA. SO FUN!! (luckily I didn't get tricked.)

I went for choir practice today, and the conductor put me in alto 1! =) So FUN! ooops..I keep using the word FUN!! But it really is!!

Class orientation starts on monday. I really hope I meet people who I really like in my class. And. I hope I don't get stuck with people who are simply impossible for PW.

I practised piano just now, and after 5 days of not practising, my fingers hurt. Fingertips. They are smarting..a little.

I have so many tan lines!!!

*back to peeling of my skin.

2009-02-01T20:37:00.000+08:00

I AM SICK!

And when you're sick you feel like the whole world's against you. Which is true in one sense. I hate being at home because it doesn't feel like one. We don't do things for each other. We divide things so equally. When it's my mother's fault my father takes it out on his children and behave as normal to my mother. My mother is hypocritical and likes to praise herself in front of my father, sister and me to make herself feel good. All she pays for is my phone bill and education policy, not our food, our lingerie, make-up stuff and even sanitary napkins cos she prefers to spend $ on herself.

Sigh, first day of school tmr..I hope orientation is fun and that I recover soon. Cya!

2009-01-30T09:52:00.000+08:00

Well, posting results are out.

Some got into the school they wanted to, while others didn't. For those who are busy with their appeals, all the best! And to those who are happy, congrats.

Somehow, I feel so fortunate to have gotten into the school I didn't mind getting into. Tj or Vj are both okay to me. =)

The last few days of slacking. Time really flies. Well, I thought I wouldn't have to put on my tk uniform anymore. but... we still have to wear it on the first day of school.

Who else got into vj?

2009-01-28T09:48:00.000+08:00

Happy cny to all!

Will be going to school later to get my autograph book from cikgu. Then coming back to practise piano=) I think I am in lack of time to practise piano man...

Cny was okay, getting red packets and all..haha.

Okay, bye. (what a short post)

2009-01-23T08:51:00.001+08:00

Went to yunie's yesterday and unfortunately, we didn't blow up her kitchen. She said she had an oven, but it wasn't microwave, so sher went to the petrol kiosk nearby and borrowed their oven while ben, yunie and I tried to very unsuccessfully conjour up a caramel sauce that we were supposed to drizzle on the plain popped popcorn that sher went all the way to the petrol kiosk to pop.

It was great fun, wasn't it! Except for the fact that her kitchen didn't get blown up.

Anyway, Singapore is really really soooo small. I met shi lin on the train when I was going to meet ben at marina square, and michelle on the way back home on bus 15. well well well.

Sharon tagged me in a note that was named "I was forced to do so..."
and in this note, I was supposed to list 20 random things about myself, and I thought, since I have the time, why not? =D but I'm not going to list it on facebook, but I'll be putting it here instead=)

I want a new piano, and I don't mind if it's second hand.
I think white's a nice colour, but then, my favourite colour for things changes depending on what it is and my mood at that point of time.
I don't have a favourite song.
Some people think they are perfect, but I wish sometimes I can just tell the truth to your face, but you're so defensive of yourself that you just can't bring yourself to accept criticism about yourself.
I hate hypocrites.
I am sorry that I don't always keep my promises, but then, so do you.
I wish that people would understand that different people have different expectations of themselves, so they should not judge me by theirs.
I wish the world can be a more understanding place to live in.
I love God and Jesus Christ for helping me in my dark moments.
I prefer sitting cross-legged on the floor than in a chair, crossing my legs beneath the table.
When I see or hear broken english, I can't help it but to correct you.
I am a perfectionist. sometimes.
I might look happy all the time, but you don't know what's inside.
I want to have more money.
I want at least a true friend who understands me and shares the same interest so we can play duets together.
I just want to be accepted for who I am.
I wish that people can be more polite in train stations and allow passengers to first alight.
I stretch my legs and spine every night and pray that I grow taller.
I blue-tack birthday cards I receive to my cupboard.
I used to mix up the words cupboard and cardboard when I thought war was pronounced wah.

That's all for today! =) byeez.

2009-01-22T08:25:00.000+08:00

I went to far east yesterday to get cny clothes with jia min and guessed who I saw? A bunch of tk girls. =_=". Really, Singapore is SO small.

List of people I saw:

Amelia
Twins
Weidi

Rav and her friends

Vanessa
Liting

Zhi jun
One other tk girl, I don't know her name

Serene (senior from chinese dance)

The world is so small man...

Anyway, I managed to get some clothes, thanks to jia min, for I'm super indecisive when it comes to buying things. I got a vest, a shirt and a piece of outfit that I don't know how to describe. If fate deem it to be, you will get to see me in it =D

I blew $63.50 yesterday, with the additional 3.5 on fried mars bars =D so nice! You should go try it too if you haven't.

Gosh, I feel so fat. later I'm going to yunie's to pop popcorn and have a movie marathon. haha. popcorn and fried mars bars. oh dear..

It's okay! I have begun to resume my nightly routine of 20 push-ups and 30 sit-ups. Actually I stopped doing push-ups because I wanted my arms to look less muscular, but I still continued with sit-ups all along for the sake of vanity that demanded a flat stomach =)

I will be going off to piano practise very soon. Been practising piano so much that my right foot hurts a little from the pedalling. And my fingers feel a little tired. After all, it's the first time I practised so much and furthermore on a daily basis. The good thing is, now they feel so accustomed to the piano, i don't have to start off with scales to warm my fingers up any longer =)

I was talking to jia min yesterday, and she told me she was giving tution too. The outrageous thing was that her rate was $15 per hour and mine was only $7! Her pupil is in primary 6 this year, but mine's in primary 5! Man, I feel so cheated. But I WILL INCREASE MY RATE NEXT YEAR, aye, THAT I WILL! How much should I charge? $10 an hour?

*back to my beloved piano
btw, if you feel rich and decide to make a contribution to YQ's buying a new piano fund, please approach me for assistance=) (wouldn't it be good if people gave $ for birthday presents instead?)

2009-01-19T08:59:00.000+08:00

Monday! The beginning of a whole last slacking week! Not much slacking anyway, for me, that is.

I have promised my teacher to really practise to make up for the past few weeks of over-slacking. I practised the whole morning and afternoon yessterday but I only managed to touch on so little things. I HAVE BEEN WASTING MY HOLIDAYS! And now when it's coming to an end then I realise my folly. ARGH.

It's so fun to talk to ben with victorian times' english! haha.=)

Anyway, back to my main point. I'm still not sure if I am going to take music as a career, as my passion for science is similarly strong as it is for music presently, and my teacher said if I wanted to take grade 8 next year I must work hard now. I understand that fact perfectly well, and her disappointment in me has given me motivation to stick with practice, even though IT'S SO TIRING TO PRACTISE.

Ben has given up talking to me. What a disappointment. I thought she would be able to withstand my craziness a bit longer. Anyway.

Wow. 15 min has passed while I just searched for nice doable quizzes.
And in the end, I'm giving up=)

Going to play some games until the clock strikes 10 then I'm going to practise piano=)

2009-01-17T09:30:00.000+08:00

WHEE! It's another one week gone by!

The next week is our last slacking week like forever, unless you count in the fact that we have to wait for two more years to enjoy simply slacking and doing nothing because you don't have anything to do.

I started tution classes (not for myself, but tutoring others) on tues. My tutee was a nice, polite girl named Pei Yan. I hope she stays this way forever so I won't have to get upset at her and end up with (too much) wrinkles scattered over my face when I'm old and toothless. For some reason or another, she seems frightened of me. A little anyway. Cos when I edged my chair nearer to hers because she was seated too far away, she MOVED away from me. Gosh. Do I look so scary? Or maybe I have a threatening aura around me. =D That's cool. =D=DDD

I was watching Iijimae last night and I suddenly noticed this itchy blister on my pinkie. It was located in such a weird area. Why would my PINKIE have a blister? hmmm. Furthermore, it was placed at the spot between my last and 4th finger, at the bottom where the two fingers join up and meet the palm.

I just burst it after breakfast just now. The liquid was white first, but now it's yellow. Am I disgusting you? Then maybe I shouldn't go on =D

I just took a quiz at quizilla, and the quiz was named What Does Your Handwriting say about you. I am a FRIENDLY PERSON! =DD

I wonder how long we'll have to take before we get the chance to do quizzes because we're bored. well, two years is the max anyway. My phone is chipping. Lousy quality, cheat my money!

2009-01-15T09:46:00.000+08:00

I just submitted my choices on the JAE website.

There were 12 choices, and mine are as follows:

Victoria Junior College (Science)
Temasek Junior College (Science)
National Junior College (Science)
Meridian Junior College (Science)
Anglo-Chinese Junior College (Science)
Nanyang Junior College (Science)
Raffles Junior College (Science)
St Andrew's Junior College (Science)
Applied Food Science and Technology (Temasek Polytechnic)
Food Science and Technology (Singapore Polytechnic)
Biomedical Science (Singapore Polytechnic)
Biotechnology (Singapore Polytechnic)

I hope to get into vj, and this might surprise you, but I'm not going to take music after all. I think I will be able learn music better and be able to enjoy it best if I don't learn it in a pressurised environment.

2009-01-12T19:38:00.000+08:00

Today was Judgement Day.

I was tingling all the way from my head to my very toes. I woke up at 7 and couldn't get back to sleep. I completed my last of the farewell cards and made my way to gran's. I couldn't manage to eat breakfast, and I didn't feel hungry anyway.

It was sentimental for me, the process of getting ready to get to school. It was the ever last time that I would put on my uniform, my badge, my nametag...wearing my tkg socks and white school shoes for the last time...

Walking to school for the last time..gathered in the hall with the whole 2008 sec 4 cohort for the last time..

I was feeling anxious and nervous all the way, listening to all those speeches, cheering for our cohort, feeling proud of everyone, for doing their best so that we could have the best results in 11 years, most probably. =)

I was feeling so faint, breathless...my fingers felt numb, like there wasn't enough blood in my system to go around. Finally, the time came. I signed the necessary docs so as to acknowledge receipt of the things I have received. I made my way back where my junior was waiting for me and at the same time, making sure that no one came to stomp on my bag..

I looked at my results first. I was so relieved that my english was an A1, but bitterly disappointed by my B3 for combined humanities. My hands were shaking so hard that I couldn't tear the letter open, so my junior did it for me. I saw my L1R5, my junior exclaimed over my results and said she hoped to do as well as I did.

However, I wasn't satisfied. I had hoped to do better. My results are alright, I suppose, my family members are fine with it, but there is just this perfectionist side of me that can't stop mourning over my results.

I am attending tj's openhouse tomorrow. I still can't decide where to go. My mind was set on tj, but now I am having second thoughts. Vj has more scholarship opportunities but tj's music programme is better.

sigh.

dunno la.

2009-01-11T10:51:00.000+08:00

Had a sleepover at fish's earlier this week. It was really the first time I slept at 3 plus. haha. I'm not nocturnal like you guys! Pics on facebook.

Results are coming out on monday! I feel restless and nervous. Don't everyone? Sigh. I really hope to get the results that I want to. What if I can't even get into jc? I'm so worried.

We're meeting in school tomorrow for lunch. It'll be sentimental for me, as it will be the last ever time to eat in school in tk uniform with my bunch of crazy friends. I'll miss all of you dearly!

2009-01-01T11:08:00.000+08:00

Hey everyone! It's 1st Jan 2009, the first day of the new year! (duh) haha.

With the arrival of 2009 comes new year resolutions. Thus, my ones will be:

To study hard and be in at least the top five in class
To excel in piano
To learn another musical instrument
To earn more money and save them up for my music lessons
Always be optimistic
Take things in my stride
Revise my lessons every night....
Keep an accounting book
Use my organiser for the whole year and not only for the first few months
Eat lesser and lose weight!

With the limited strength the we humans have and the imperfections that we own, it is doubtful that I can fulfill all my new year resolutions, however, I shall strive hard to accomplish most of them!

The new year brings along with it many different challenges and surprises. It shall also be the time where everything we do affects our future. It is the time where we have to make decisions that will leave an impact in our lives.

Regardless of what happens, it is important not to leave any regrets behind. Make choices, stick with it, and be responsible for what you have chosen.

We remember the times we have had, we have cried together, we have made friends, we have lost some, but all in all, 2008 was one of my best years ever, even with the horrible Os, headaches, heartaches, and tears.

It is however, time to move on to embrace a different life, in jc, in poly, or anywhere else, may everyone find happiness and satisfaction in all that you strive to achieve!