Hey:)
I had cereal fish for dinner as one of the dishes just now...and somehow, I was reminded of... the choir days..haha..am I too sentimental? The cereal smell somehow brought back all the memories of cereal chicken at thaipan, and also in school when we once ordered dinner from ms jancy and the ball almost hit jiaen's head. :) haha it sounds kinda weird and disjointed when I read it from the start of the paragraph! Chengwei and a few of the other guys, playing around with the ball after dinner at the long grass patch outside the choir room=)
The moment the memories hit me, so did the emotions. I didn't realise my life was so entangled with choir, could it even be unhealthy? sigh... you know this feeling of depression when you feel like nothing else matters anymore, what else in life holds for you, what are you living for, why are you even doing the things that currently hold your attention....
Well, dwelling on the negative thoughts, I really see no point in us studying so hard, all in a day's effort for just a pathetic slip of paper. I can't speak for others, but I know I don't understand most mathematic concepts. I just memorise, and to ridicule how the country's education system work, take a look at the aces that decorate my result slip. Forcing myself to study because I have to, because of the eyes that will banish me to a world of their disappointment and fall of their expectations, because of all reasons that have nothing to do with what I want.
If the society wasn't so demanding of qualifications, I will just go study some random subjects like farming and gardening:)
Graduating from junior college, moving into hopefully a local university, moving on, finding a job, building a family, growing old, death...
Seems like a motion what most people go through...sighh...so boring right..
But negative thoughts aside, I'm treating the mugging for CT 2s now as a payment for the enjoyment I will get after CT 2s, however short it may be. The mugging can also payoff for the past one week I've been out or the future days I'll go out and play!
I went studying with alex yesterday. After sieving through the many options in the small island of singapore, we decided to head towards school! :) I finished binomial yesterday.
To tell the truth, I'm school-sick. Meaning I miss school ah.. I don't know why though..could it be I miss the people that I have been seeing almost everyday for the past few months? Or could it be that I just miss the environment and the familiar surroundings in school.. To come to think of it, we only have 4 more months to be in school as a rightful student. Someone who actually has reason to be in school. Using the classrooms, the tables, the chair, right down to the toilet in the T block....yes I know I'm being sentimental again. I get so attached to places where I have beautiful memories:) I don't want to grow up, I don't want to face the world. I want to continue being a student where teachers will take care of you and your schoolmates will smile to you in the corridor. University is different. It seems to me, a place where people pursue their own individual degrees, their own paths...where in jc now, all of us work towards this common goal, A levels! :)
School is really more than choir for me. It's also the people, the atmosphere, the bonding between people sharing the same uniform and badge. mmmm....maybe I'm overstating a little, but somehow I feel bonded to schoolmates even if we don't really know each other. haha. maybe it's because of those few common memories...
Continuing on from negative thoughts aside, I think life can be as fun as how you want it to be! :) Organising activities to bring people together, creating fun in the family...depends on how you want to spend your time, meaningfully or not.
I will be going to school tomorrow again, seems like the year 1s have practice *wistful smile. But I think I will be avoiding them..dunno how though, maybe during altos sectionals I will escape to the classrooms. But on monday when Alex and I studied we were chased out of the classroom. We sought refuge outside the staffroom instead:)
A recount of last week's events:
Mon-A very fun class outing! A first time in L4D, went to the arcade and pooled! haha.
Tues-Did hbl at merv's
Wed-went to giammie's for bio proj hbl
Thurs-Shrek!
Fri-Vesak day with pocks, js, robins, ky, jiaen, lex
Sat-adhoc crc interview and nyjc concert!
Sun-piano lesson and tea at nydc bugis!
Adhoc and crc handover felt so final...I guess it's goodbye:)
mmm haven't been finding good books recently to read! sigh..a bit tired of the titles I have at home. Introduce me to authors you like! I crave for new volumes to devour...yumyum! haha.
The weather was thankfully cooler yesterday, though it has gotten slightly unbearable yet again! Thus my decision to escape to school after a day of melting at home! :)
quite a long post..cya!
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